So you're out in the yard with the kids in your vomit-spattered clothes, having just emerged from a beer-and-cough-syrup stupor in a drainage ditch, and your red-haired old lady comes out of the double-wide in her apron and starts squawkin' at you about the oil-burnin' heap sitting right outside the door. Her shrill voice drills into your brain; there's no escape from the nightmare! Is this Bakersfield? Texarkana? Hell no, it's Victoria, Australia! Good to see that some things are universal in the English-speaking world, eh? Anyway, Total Auto Recyclers in Dandenong will take that clunker off your hands, leaving room in the yard for the kids to snap their collarbones on a new trampoline! We heart junkyard ads here at the Jalop, just so's you know.

Half-Price Day Junkyard Day [internal]