Illustration for article titled How To Speak Australian From An Australian Trucker

If you genuinely have no idea how to speak Australian, because you've never met an Australian before, all you really need to know is that it involves long semi-incomprehensible streams of vulgar profanity. Especially if you're a trucker, and someone just pulled out directly in front of you.

This is also how Australian mothers speak to their children, I firmly believe.

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