Apparently the young lad driving the Lancer in the above video (yes, we know there's no sound — suck it up, it's worth it) is a wee bit off-course on this here rally circuit. Ok, actually, his name's Adam Kahin, and he tried to commit suicide last week in a way we've never heard of before — by crashing his car into a mall. Normally we'd suggest using a more high-po vehicle than the one he's chosen. We'd also suggest more of a hard stationary target like a brick wall than the glass doors and the perfume kiosk of a mall in Seminole County, Florida. But oh hey, he came closer on the second try, again though — a bit more speed and he coulda totally made that jump into something more spectacularly devastating than surviving and having to live through the embarrassment of being "that guy."
More random incidents of hoonage [internal]