Dodge has decided the best way to light a fire under Dart sales is to start crowdfunding them. That's why they've started the Dodge Dart Registry, and it's probably the bro-iest idea ever.
But it is way better than registering at Macy's or something, like most people do when they're getting married. People, brides in particular, go crazy picking tons of stuff they want others to buy for them and then are disappointed when someone only buys a partial set of forks and knives or the coffee maker but not the coffee cups you wanted, or stuff like that. So what you end up with is a partially furnished house, which is kind of stupid.
Naturally, the Dart Registry works in a similar way. You customize a Dart to open the registry and you can choose to partially fund it or ask to raise money for the whole thing. Set the registry to last for up to 90 days and tell everyone you know about it. You can get people to fund options over the standard car, too. Instead of registering for square plates and a salad spinner, you can get the touchscreen radio and a turbo'd engine. Then you get a big (hopefully) check to take to the dealership to buy a Dart.
It turns out, though, that it's more than just couples on the Dart Registry. So far, there's a few dozen people have filed registries and there are a lot of starving students on there. Patrick from Portland, for example, is trying to crowdfund navigation and blind-spot monitoring. Ryan from Auburn Hills says he's getting too much attention from the ladies in his '98 Escort and thinks a Dart's going to fix that.
Dude, if you're getting checked out that much while driving a shitbox, you must be getting marriage proposals at stoplights. While parked next to Jennifer Lawrence.
It's a ballsy idea on Dodge's part, but will it work? Most of them have raised very little money, if anything. Do you think people will buy into this?
Either way, I hope there's a Viper Registry in the works. Maybe all the Jalopnik readers could help chip in for some of that. Isn't Patrick George getting married? I'm sure his future wife would appreciate that instead of a Cuisinart.