Darn them Brazilians, always crashing into things with their reckless driving! And those pesky Japanese, what with their radioactive food. Don't blame Danica Patrick for fearing the world, blame the world for being so scary.
Everyone knows Danica Patrick's making the jump to NASCAR so she can reach a larger, and more profitable, audience. Nothing wrong with that. But it wasn't until this week we discovered perhaps her desire to move to NASCAR was a desire stick with a more provincial racing series.
It started with Patrick's comments about traveling to Japan for this season's IndyCar final race — the only place she's ever won. Here's some of what she said:
"I don't want to make anyone mad, but heck yeah, I'm concerned (about Japan),"
"I'm concerned about the food, to be honest. They say don't eat beef, which probably means don't eat vegetables and fruit."
"I read something about nine times the radiation in mushrooms so far out of Fukushima in that area. And there's earthquakes every week. It seems every other week there's a pretty big one. There's been a couple (magnitude) 6.5s in the last month or two."
Patrick reportedly packed five days worth of food and water for her and her husband for the trip, where she finished 11th overall. No one, as far as we know, turned into a Godzilla monster.
And then she took aim at the Brazilians in an interview with the Associated Press, describing her performance at Richmond where she moved from 32nd to 18th position by saying:
"I didn't start like a Brazilian driver and go out 'Whoooo' and hit everything and figure it out later. I started out much more patient with other drivers and patient with myself and respectful."
Brazilian driver Tony Kanaan responded on Twitter stating "she didn't start like a Brazilian because she is not capable of such a thing. Never will be."
We're looking forward to Patrick's NASCAR career and her complains about shifty Texans and the strange corn smell in Iowa.
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