COTD: The bull is strong with this one edition

Illustration for article titled COTD: The bull is strong with this one edition

The apocalyptic mini-film on the Lamborghini Aventador led Irishman72 to attempt to claim it as his own, even at the damage to his own reputation:


My name is Johnny Needermeier and I am submitting my application for consideration for your Craigslist posting for a CGI graphic artist.

Attached is a video clip I did for LAMBORGHINI. Well, to be honest, it's about a Lamborghini. I call it, "Aventador: A Relentless Force". I whipped it up yesterday using a scan from Car & Driver, a totally rad noise file I found on an old usenet bulletin board, and some stock CGI footage I created for a video game where this dude is running from aliens who are chasing him with these totally awesome Ground Obliterators and he runs into the Iron Rod Plains where the aliens can't go because they're allergic to iron, but then he's confronted by an AIR DEMON whose ass he kicks with his COMPLETELY BITCHIN' HURRICANE VORTEX GENERATOR—

I digress. I realize there are storyline inconsistencies in the attached video. The Lambo, for instance, isn't so much a relentless force as it is good at reacting to various relentless forces. Why do The Iron Plains sprout rods of iron from the ground? Why is a car running from Ground Obliterators and AIR DEMONS in the first place?

Here's the answer: IT DOESN'T MATTER! A video like this won't make the guy who can afford the car buy the car, but it'll make the guy who will NEVER afford the car think the car's totally bitchin'. This ups the image value of the car and increases the price the rich bastard's willing to pay because he wants all the little people to think he's AWESOME!!!!

I'm honest enough to realize I'm annoying, and I apologize for it in advance, but I'm great at what I do. My salary requirement is $400,000 per year and unlimited access to your corporate snack bar. And Red Bull. Lotsandlots of Red Bull.

Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to your call.



Congratulations, Mr. Irishman72, with your COTD today! (You're something else!) My award to you is this awesome Lamborghini to add to your collection. It will be brought to you by none other than the lovely Brook Burke. Great job!!!