COTD: J.D. Power Award Edition

Illustration for article titled COTD: J.D. Power Award Edition

Automotive-industry awards have always been a mixed bag. Alongside any number of Car of the Year charades, specific aspects of the industry attract attention with varying degrees of credibility. Still, the award for giving out the most Eighties-style sculptures for everything goes to one entity: J.D. Power and Associates.


I'm sure the manufacturers love these folks, because it's something positive to talk about. Who wouldn't want to advertise their Best Vehicle Quality In The First Ninety Days Of Ownership award? Personally, I lay some of the blame for the rise of beige at their likely very glossy and impressive corporate doors: they've never given out an award for "most fun" or "most inspiring," as far as I know.

But that's not what matters to most people: Folks want reliability and durability and good customer service. So should he discreetly be a JDP judge, we think we know which aftermarket company Desu-San-Desu will be nominating for the customer-care award given their sincere personal attention to an enthusiastic BMW driver:

Mr. Wunnem Ulner,

Thank you for contacting us at N-E-Ting Goes Custom Automotive Works. Your business is very important to us and we shall endeavor to provide the very best value and service possible. It is for that same reason that we are contacting you today.

We would like to verify your order and make sure that the order description is not in error.

On 2-23-2012, you submitted an order request for:

"Windshield wipers to be installed on the front passenger windows of [your] 2012 BMW 1M."

We would just like the verify that this is correct and that you did not mean for us to install windshield wipers on the windshield. If you would just please verify with us that you do indeed wish to have a wiper system installed on your passenger windows, we can go ahead and get started on your order as soon as possible.

Jason Moorespeed
Shop Manager
N-E-Ting Goes Custom Automotive Works

P.S. - We noticed that your 'Sideways is the Best Way' bumper sticker is faded and apparently suffering from some minor scrape marks. Would you like us to replace it, free-of-charge, while we have your vehicle here?


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Congratulations, Mr. Desu-San-Desu, on COTD today! I don't have a J. D. Power award for you, but I do have this award. Here's a BMW which this lovely lady will bring to you as soon as she's finished loving it. Nice one, Desu!