The words are familiar to anyone who can spell NAFTA: "It's a global marketplace." Buick is the toast of China, and a French company builds our Japanese Chryslers. We can get German chocolate cake in Mexicantown while we've got the Asian flu. Like it or not, more than ever before we are all one, sharing ideas, traditions, machines, and yes, sometimes even language. Unfortunately, the process isn't always a smooth one. Take, for example, a peculiar language we Jalops should speak fluently: Race car driver. Alas, The Stig threw us for a loop when we read his cryptic analysis of the Nissan GT-R after he test-drove it on the Isle of Man. That's when graverobber stepped in to give us all the breakdown.
What? You don't speak asterisk? He is complaining that the car is unequal in side-loading weight transfer, likely due to the added weight on the right side from the secondary driveshaft. Also, the drop-off of the hood makes positioning difficult in race traffic.
He goes on to say that once, while they were on location, he snuck into Clarkson's trailer and put Jeremy's toothbrush up his bum, and then put it back. He still gets the dry heaves every time he sees him pick at his teeth.
He also says he once went out drinking with Mays and had ended up having to spend the night on his couch. This is why he now wears the full-body race suit exclusively.
Lastly, he claims that he once snogged Hammond's wife, but that was before they got married, and that he cut the tire on the Dragon jet car in order to get rid of him so they could continue the affair, but that it only brought them closer together.
Geez, do I have to do everything around here?
Helpful. But if we rifle through your stuff and find a white racing helmet, we're gonna have a few more questions for you, sir.
[Photo Credit: MovieWallpapers]