Comment Of The Day: Emissions Scandal Joke Edition

Poor Volkswagens. They sit withering away in a town that has withered away next to a football stadium that has withered away. When will the withering end? Will the VWs face the same fate as their surroundings, blending in entirely unnoticed? No. Not all of them. For some will be freed—well, stolen.

And the reason for this theft is really quite simple. Let reader CitronC tell you:

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(Get it? Because it’s called the “Dieselgate” scandal, a word that is a concatenation of “diesel”—the fuel used in the over 500,000 polluting cars—and “gate,” the last syllable of Watergate, the group of buildings in which the Nixon scandal took place, and the four letters now appended to all scandals by the media. Gate is also a physical barrier that one closes to keep something inside [or outside]. Forgetting to close a gate tends to result in something going missing. Sixty Volkswagens, for example).

If you still don’t get it, don’t worry about it. Just relax and listen to a song you haven’t thought about in 17 years:

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About the author

David Tracy

Writer, Jalopnik. 1979 Jeep Cherokee Golden Eagle, 1985 Jeep J10, 1948 Willys CJ-2A, 1995 Jeep Cherokee, 1992 Jeep Cherokee auto, 1991 Jeep Cherokee 5spd, 1976 Jeep DJ-5D, totaled 2003 Kia Rio