I’ll be the first to admit that I am lightyears away from being any Ernest Hemingway. My thoughts are often jumbled, which means that I need approximately a billion words to get them all out. But every now and again the avatar of Hemingway shows up in the form of a commenter, and they say exactly what we all believe, deep down inside.
It took me 367 words to elucidate exactly why I really dislike the Aston Martin DB9 GT James Bond Edition. Don’t get me wrong, plop an Aston Martin DB9 GT into my lap, and I’ll love you forever. But give it a dorky startup screen and sill plates, and suddenly you’ve turned one of the coolest cars on the road to one that, well, isn’t. I could write more words about why I don’t like it, but reader Teleph0nes did a much better job, and they did it with 300 fewer words:
Ugh. This is basically wearing automotive branded jackets, hats, shoes, etc while driving the car of that brand, but turned into a car. It’s like a Cocaine Edition Lamborghini Countach (aren’t they all?). It’s like Ferrari coming out with a “The Ferrari” edition of Ferraris.
It’s The Simpson’s quote: “Radioactive Man wouldn’t wear a smock with his face on it”
Stop Branding things. Just knock it off.
An Aston Martin is already the James Bond car. You don’t need it to say “007” on the infotainment system for everyone else to understand that.
Congrats on your COTD win, Teleph0nes! May you forever drive cars that don’t need to remind people what they stand for.
Photo credit: Andy Mitchell
Contact the author at ballaban@jalopnik.com.
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