BMW's Extra-Long "Enter All The Sportscars" Press Release, tl;dr'd

Illustration for article titled BMW's Extra-Long "Enter All The Sportscars" Press Release, tl;dr'd

BMW, like any company worth its salt who wants to stay in good graces with enthusiasts despite making bigger, heavier and more complicated cars, does a lot of racing. Recently, they sent out a wall of text outlining their extensive motorsport plans for next year. Here is the tl;dr version for your convenience.


At the Season Review in Maisach, BMW Motorsport director Jens Marquardt introduced all of the marque's plans for next year.

"Like Porsche, we've made our race cars the most desirable new cars we make," he didn't say. "You'll watch and have to restrain yourself from licking the screen every time you see the fantastically mean looking Z4 GT racers or M4 DTMs on TV because we don't have to pump

that glorious sound into the cabin through the audio system."

"Then, of course, you'll wonder why some Müller gets to drive them and you don't, totally questioning where you went wrong with your life," he absolutely did not continue.

Oh, and American driver Joey Hand won't be in one next year, either.


BMW is fielding eight M4s in the Deutsche Tourenwagen Masters, because something has to represent the hard streets of Bavaria, and it darn sure can't be an Isetta. Most of the driver lineup remains the same, with reigning DTM champ Marco Wittmann staying in a BMW.

Team RLL is staying in the GTLM class in United SportsCar. Dirk Werner and Lucas Luhr join the team for the full season, and Bill Auberlen is a) still alive and b) not actually that old, Travis. Geez.


BMW completely ignores that the World Endurance Championship exists and calls European Le Mans Series the pinnacle of endurance racing in Europe. You care because the Z4 GTE is cool and three-time World Touring Car Champion Andy Priaulx will be on the team.

A ton of people will be racing for the top prize at the 24h Nürburgring. It is BMW's home turf (sort of; Porsche would tell them to get off their lawn) and the Z4 GT3 can't be upstaged by some fartknockers in a GT-R.


Alessandro Zanardi will remain on as Brand Ambassador for having the single greatest story in motorsports right now.


The BMW Motorsport Junior program has shown success with Jesse Krohn, who moves up to GT racing on the 24h Nürburgring team. They're going to keep that program around.

- 30 - / We know you still want a Z4 GTLM in your garage.

Photo credit: Getty Images


Do they still officially participate in ETCC or BTCC? (come to think of it I haven't heard much about ETCC the last couple years) Also DTM is great and GTE is the best, but it's a shame they don't have an F1 team anymore or better yet an LMP team.