BMW iDrive Is Getting More "Updates"

Illustration for article titled BMW iDrive Is Getting More Updates

BMW's unholy technological tour-de-force iDrive continues to get additional impressive features. This time around, iDrive is going super-customizable with unique screensavers, backgrounds, sound effects. Of particular interest, via iDrive users will now be able to make performance tweaks like adjusting engine boost levels and transmission shift points. So, how does it work? That's where the fun lies.

The iDrive can be customized and updated from any Internet-enabled computer thanks to GSM telematics (think cell phone technology), which automatically feeds updates to the car. It can also be updated using a USB flash drive, burned CD, or from the inside of the car itself. Check out the link for even more iDrive goodies. [Bimmerfile]

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BMW's iCan'tDrive is the antithesis of the Ultimate Driving Machine. You dare not try to use it while driving. You have to fiddle the dials and push the buttons more than your first fumbling attempts at oral sex. You'll twist the knobs, overshoot the mark and have to come back. You'll scramble all the radio presets. You'll spend more time trying to adjust the settings than you ever did trying to set the clock on your VCR, and the only reason for it is because you spent so much damned money to buy the thing, it must be worth the effort, right? Right?

If BMW were serious about being the Ultimate Driving Machine, the iDrive would be foisted off on a car company that could make it work. Like Ford did with Sync.

A truly excellent car, like your frustrated date under your clumsy ministrations, would eventually just sigh and say, "look, let's just go, okay? Can we go?"

Rip out the iDrive. It's okay if the dash clock is flashing 12:00. Let's just go.