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2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part Three

Illustration for article titled 2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part Three
Jalopnik ReviewsAll of our test drives in one convenient place.

Why you should buy this car:
You've always wanted a Hummer but have thus far been put off by their lack of practicality. You want a pickup bed, but not a pickup. You find tribal tattoos strangely appealing.

Why you shouldn't:
Your ultimate goal is turning it into a lowrider. You've got a set of 35" dubs sitting around, waiting for a project; just stick with the H2. You live East of the Mississippi. You wish there was a Humbrid version. You want a work truck that can haul a load of drywall. You spell off-road J-E-E-P.

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Suitability Parameters:
Speed Merchants: No
Fashion Victims: Yes
Treehuggers: No
Mack Daddies: Yes
Tuner Crowd: No
Hairdressers: No
Penny Pinchers: No
Euro Snobs: No
Working Stiffs: No
Technogeeks: No
Poseurs: Yes
Soccer Moms: Yes
Nascar Dads: Yes
Golfing Grandparents: No

Also Consider:
• Nissan Frontier
• Toyota Tundra
• Ford Explorer Sport Trac
• Chevy Silverado

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Vitals:
• Manufacturer: Hummer
• Model tested: H3T Alpha
• Model year: 2009
• Base Price: $N/A
• Price as Tested: $N/A
• Engine type: 5.3 Liter OHV V-8
• Horsepower: 300 @ 5,200 RPM*
• Torque: 320lb/ft @ 4,000 RPM*
• Red Line: 6,000 RPM
• Transmission: Hydra-Matic 4L60 4-Speed Automatic
• Curb Weight: 4,850 lbs
• LxWxH: 210.3" x 85.1" x 72.2"
• Wheelbase: 134.2"
• Tires: 33" 285/75 R16
• Drive type: 4WD
• 0 - 60 mph: Approx 8 seconds
• 1/4-mile: N/A seconds
• Top speed: 98 MPH
• EPA Fuel economy city/highway: N/A
• NHTSA crash test rating: N/A

*Pending SAE certification


Also see:


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DISCUSSION

@nick2ny: I kind of dig the truck but not really the wheels. Or any of the electronic BS. Strip one of those babies down to window cranks and rubber floors, radio delete, lose the fluff, stamp a Chevy emblem on it, call it an S-10, charge $17K for it tops and I'll be there.

I'm not holding my breath. But they built me a car so I can't bitch. I was the only one that bought one, it must have been for me.