Drive Your Cars You Cowards

We may earn a commission from links on this page.
Image for article titled Drive Your Cars You Cowards
Image: Bonhams

Here at Jalopnik, we try not to be redundant in the subject matter of our blogs. Redundancy would be boring for us, boring for you, and would eventually rid us of our prized spot on your bookmark bar. But if there’s anything that needs to be said again, and again, and again, it’s this: Cars are meant to be driven.

Yes, even you, Bugatti customers with an average of 42 cars: Drive them. They’re not there for you to snap an Instagram photo of upon delivery and then retire to your multi-floor garage, to be seen only by the staff who washes them weekly, perhaps vents to them about how silly all of the washing is if they never leave the house, and eventually lists them for sale because you’ve found new ones to take their place. They’ve got a steering wheel and tires for a reason.

Advertisement
Image for article titled Drive Your Cars You Cowards
Image: Bonhams
Advertisement

This latest bout of annoyance on the topic of driving cars comes courtesy of an Aston Martin Vanquish Zagato Shooting Brake and its nearly 600-horsepower V12 that went to Bonhams’ “Aston Martin Sale” on May 19. It’s one of 99 made and isn’t marked as sold, but has a listed price of between $800,000 and $960,000 compared to its highly speculated price from the factory of at least $500,000.

Advertisement

But the price isn’t what jumps out in the listing. It’s the part that brags of “43 miles from new,” which is approximately enough miles to unload it from a trailer, take it to the nearest scenic area, and snap a few photos for the ‘gram.

Image for article titled Drive Your Cars You Cowards
Image: Bonhams
Advertisement

The Zagato Shooting Brake is a stunning car, even if this one’s bronze accents are, well, unique—one that communicates that its owner doesn’t simply go for the generic rich-person buy, but instead for what a car enthusiast would buy if they won the lottery, which would be a proud banner to drive around with.

You know what doesn’t communicate that? Selling it after 43 miles. (Barring any unforeseen events that might have led to the sale, of course.)

Advertisement

Alas, these words mean nothing, because the failure to drive cars and then sell them—however many months or years later—is a sickness that will never fully disappear. Just try not to go to a fancy auction and get coughed on, alright?

[h/t D’Marge]