Rambo Will Not Fight ISIS In His Next And Last Movie (UPDATED)

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Don’t worry, everyone. Rambo’s got this. (Update: No he doesn’t.)

Rambo’s real-life alter ego Sylvester Stallone, announced at Comic-Con that the final Rambo movie will pitt Rambo against ISIS. The film will apparently be called “Last Blood,” and the Islamic State is the enemy. This is a change from Stallone’s previous plan of taking on the cartels.

ForeignPolicy.com notes that Rambo actually supported islamic rebels back in ‘88 in Rambo III, which was “dedicated to the brave Mujahideen fighters of Afghanistan.”

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Foreign Policy further reports that Stallone has teams “scouting Iraq and parts of Syria where ISIS have their greatest strongholds” and “working with the locals there to help deliver the most intense and realistic Rambo movie experience ever.”

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Do you hear that? Rambo already has teams working on ISIS as we speak.

We’re in the clear. No more blowing up babies. Rambo’s gonna turn this around, just like he did in ‘Nam.

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UPDATED: It was all a hoax. Rambo will not fight ISIS. All hope is lost, surrender now to the Islamic State we will not have Rambo to save us.

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(Hat tip to Rodrigo Ugarte. Thanks, man!)

Image Credit: Rambo III, when he blows up a helicopter with a bow and arrow. Just imagine that, but with ISIS

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Contact the author at raphael@jalopnik.com.