Okay, sit down. Seriously, sit down. Sit down. What we’ve got here is basically a tank. A drift tank. A tank that can drift. And fly over everything. Not, like, literally. But it can, like the Batman. And it is the greatest thing I have ever seen today.
Guhhhhhhhhhhh GIVE IT TO ME. And by “it,” I mean the Ripsaw EV2, which is clearly the pinnacle of all human achievement. Greater than the pyramids, greater than hockey, greater than a sandwich at Primanti Brothers. I never saw a Ripsaw EV2 before today, and it is already better than all of those things.
The EV2 comes from the same people at Howe & Howe who made the original, stripped-down civvie tank, the EV1, and its little tank/ATV hybrid version, the Mini Ripsaw. And while the those first two iterations were neat, they didn’t manage to capture my heart the way the EV2 has. They were stripped down, looking a little bit like homemade monsters built out of a kit, and left the people inside exposed to the elements. Specifications aren’t forthcoming just yet, but the EV1 was powered by a 6.6-liter Duramax diesel V8. I don’t imagine the EV2 is much of a downgrade, because just look at it.
The EV2 actually resembles something you could use to ride into a post-apocalyptic battle over, well, whatever people fight over in the post-apocalypse. Beanie babies, probably.
But the EV2 doesn’t just look like a stealth tank from hell on the outside, it looks fantastic on the inside, too.
If you don’t want to feel like a stealth tank pilot from the future while sitting in there, then you have no soul.
Maybe a demon in a Ripsaw EV2 already sucked it out of you.