Who Says A 1980 Buick LeSabre Isn't A Performance Car?

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Conventional wisdom goes that you get the most performance potential out of a sports car. Yes, but what about a 1980 Buick LeSabre?

A sports car is a car you want to preserve, appreciate, enjoy. A car for solitary and thoughtful dries on empty roads. A somewhat serious vehicle for a somewhat serious endeavor of driving quickly.

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A 1980 LeSabre, however, is a car that you use to rip donuts in a quarry. A car for jumping into. A car for running into joyous destruction.

So who says it's not a performance car?