For $7,999, I Pity The Fool Who Messes With The Dukes.S

Creepy vans carrying offers of free candy may be an Internet stereotype, but today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe General Lee Chevy van does make the idea of the Duke Boys seem wildly inappropriate. Will you think its price is too?

With a healthy 83% Nice Price win, yesterday's 1972 Toyota Hilux petite pickup showed it was still able to not only haul, but haul in some decent bank. Of course, the open bed of a any size of truck does not offer much in the way of security unless populated by an amply sized and potentially very horny dog. Lacking that, and needing to ensure your cargo is safe from both pilfering and perhaps prying eyes, you might just want to invest in a panel van.

For $7,999, I Pity The Fool Who Messes With The Dukes.S

And maybe today's TV series mashup Custom 1985 Chevy Van would do the trick. Described as an A-Team van clone in General Lee colors (?) this G-series will abso-freaking-lutely stand out in any crowd. It will also likely draw a crowd, either of Dukes of Hazzard fans, or devotees of that bastion of high brow TV, the A-Team. Or perhaps those same groups will descend upon this custom panel van with torches and pitchforks, it being such a spectacularly weird combination of themes.

Freaky as it may be, there's little to go on regarding the truck's specifications in the ad aside from the fact that it has a horn that plays dixie. If that doesn't make you want to stuff a cat in each ear, you're probably eating grits right now. Thing of it is, there's just not a whole lot to tell about the Chevy G-Van as it enjoyed a production run more than twice as long as the two series it seeks to emulate. Engine? Yeah, likely, there were a selection of sixes and eights offered that year. Most likely it's the 5.0 as I think that would have been the most common selection. Plus there's a pic of two into one pipes underneath indicating something snapping its cylinders in a V formation. The tranny - if I may use that term in relation to something so obviously virile and manly - is a three speed slusher.

For $7,999, I Pity The Fool Who Messes With The Dukes.S

As emblematic of your favorite TV shows (come on, admit it) as the exterior is, the interior is all rerun. That is if you've had experience rolling in a creepy panel van. The front compartment is color coordinated in a shade of blue to match Daisy Duke's cheeky cut-offs, while the rear section remains austerely white and institutional. And, with removal of the crappy rug, easy to hose out.

Mileage? Disclosure of high speed jumps across creek beds or role in the complex and edge of your seat escape of a comrade from a foreign prison? Who the hell knows, as the seller maintains that the pics have to do all the talking. Of course when you have a Van that's channeling BOTH the A-Team and the Dukes of Hazzard, the opportunity for adventure is obviously unlimited.

For $7,999, I Pity The Fool Who Messes With The Dukes.S

Not unlimited is the demand for fundage to buy this homage as the seller asks but $7,999 for the honor. That gets you TWO TV shows plus a Van to cart them around in. America, I love this place. Do you too love this Chevy Van and its price? What do you think, is eight large a fair price to roll in such style? Or, do you pity the fool who would think that price is Boss Hogg?

You decide!

Tampa Craigslist or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to Bamboojay via the Twitter for the hookup!

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