What Should Nikita Mazepin Do Next?

Nikita Mazepin F1 driver is done, all hail Nikita Mazepin Humpty Dumpty impersonator.

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A photo of Nikita Mazepin blended with Humpty Dumpty
If you were a sacked F1 driver, what would you do?
Photo: Somanyhorsesru журнал (Wikimedia Commons), Christopher Wood (Wikimedia Commons) & Steve DaSilva

You might have not have heard, but Formula 1 driver Nikita Mazepin is out of a seat this year. Just a week before the 2022 season started, Mazepin was dropped by Haas as it cut ties with title sponsor Uralkali. So, what should he do instead?

Mazepin joined F1 when he was just 22. He managed one season in the sport before being booted out on March 5th – just three days after he turned 23.

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So, with the average life expectancy of a Russian male now sitting pretty at 73 years old, what should he do for the next 50 years?

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He’s already said he only wants to race in F1 and won’t set foot in other series. So he could spend a few months on the sidelines waiting for a spot to open up.

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Or, he might want to follow in his fathers footsteps and work as a Belarusian interpreter before switching fields to become the CEO of a fertilizer company.

Or maybe, as has been suggested by several writers here at Jalopnik, he should lean into his likeness and become a fairground Humpty Dumpty impersonator. It’s a noble profession.

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Finally, he might want to write an expose on the Haas F1 teamwe love those kinds of posts around these parts.

But, what do you think the young whippersnapper should get up to next?