Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work

Photos: Porsche (lol)
Photos: Porsche (lol)

Porsche, the German automaker that makes performance cars for watch collectors, has sadly become confused on the meaning of words and the industry phenomenon known as “spy shots.”

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Porsche recently commissioned “official” spy photos of its upcoming Macan crossover refresh, comically missing out on the irony of the concept of staged spy photos.

The very nature of spy photography is that there’s nothing official about it.

Spy photography is great because it’s an opportunity for us to peer behind the curtain automakers don’t want us behind, where we get an idea of a car in an uncontrolled environment. We sometimes get an idea of what the car will look like and sound like, sometimes years ahead of a release. It can be kind of exciting!

Spy photography usually just involves someone hiding in an itchy bush or at a popular gas station near an area known to be frequented by automakers to benchmark and test the vehicles in development, and then these renegade photographers sell the photos off to outlets that like that sort of stuff.

Spy photography certainly is not an automaker organizing a leisurely drive in an environment of their choosing, with a photographer on their payroll. The very concept is absurd. And yet Porsche did it. They didn’t even try to hide it!

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Clearly Porsche pulled this stunt just to get people to talk about the car and the company, but they look damn foolish. I’m not sure tacky, minor publicity stunts like this do much to enhance a brand selling six-figure sports cars and crossovers. Next time, just normal pictures will do.

So here you go. Since official and spy naturally cancel out, here are just some photos of a taped up fleet of Macans of absolutely zero value or purpose driving in some dirt and posing for you.

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Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work
Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work
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Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work
Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work
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Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work
Illustration for article titled Porsche Does Not Know How Spy Shots Work

Reviews Editor, Jalopnik

DISCUSSION

Can someone please explain the Macan to me? It’s tiny, has little room for passengers, and even less for stuff. I mean, it’s a vehicle that takes the “U’ out of “SUV”. And for the privilege of owning this thing we get to spend as much as the GDP of some third world country! And yet, here in Southwest Ct,. they are all over the place! I mean, it’s like they reproduce during the night and then during the day wander around aimlessly, forever doing 59 in the left lane on 95, taking up two parking spaces at the local CVS, and waiting until the light turns yellow before the driver looks up from their lap to FINALLY move after the honking of the car behind fails to get their attention, but managed to attract geese looking to mate!