Miami Beach Is Charging Spring Breakers $100 To Park Because They Wreck The City

The out-of-towner up charge is part of the city's plan to "break up with spring break."

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Miami Beach is known as one of the spring break capitols of the country, with thousands of college-age youths swarming the warm beaches for a weekend of underage drinking, partying, and causing havoc. After decades of putting up with the tradition, the town is pulling out all the stops to crack down on the mess that spring break has become. In addition to banning all short-term rentals in the city, parking prices for visitors in March will be jacked way up, many lots will be closed, towing prices are doubled, plate readers and DUI checkpoints will be in place.

Driving the streets of Miami in March was always difficult, but visitors should get ready for it to be a nightmare. And that’s by design.

Miami Beach Is Breaking Up With Spring Break

The city says you can expect the following:

...curfews, security searches and bag checks at beach access points, early beach entrance closures, DUI checkpoints, bumper-to-bumper traffic, road closures, and arrests for drug possession and violence.

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Every Thursday through Sunday this month, the city will charge $30 to park in all parking garages and surface lots, but during the high-traffic weekends (March 7-10 and March 14-17) the surface lots will be closed entirely, and parking garages will charge $100. These rates don’t apply to Miami Beach residents or workers who live out of town.

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To keep the partying to a minimum, the city has also mandated that all liquor stores close at 8 p.m., and any businesses renting golf carts, Polaris Slingshots, scooters, mopeds, or e-bikes must be closed on the high-traffic weekends. The cops will also be running weekend DUI checkpoints and license plate readers around the city.

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The city is hoping that if spring breakers can’t drive anywhere, park anywhere, drink anywhere, or hang out on the beach, they’ll leave the city alone. From what little I know about spring breakers, you know, from watching the 2012 Harmony Korine movie, these measures likely won’t deter them from fucking up the city anyway. Good luck Miami Beach!