Stoned Tesla Driver Crashes So Hard It Sends Batteries Flying Into Nearby Apartments

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Image: Corvallis Police Department

Guess what Tesla-stans! There was a Tesla wreck that I am not going to suggest was related to the use of Telsa’s Level 2 semi-autonomous Autopilot system! Nope, this one was caused by good, old-fashioned human brains, rendered high via the application of some drugs. No need for advanced AI systems here, just a bunch of that plant Elon always likes to talk about. Luckily and incredibly, nobody was hurt, though cells from the Tesla’s smashed battery pack ended up in some nearby apartments.


The crash happened in Corvallis, Oregon, when a driver, said to be high on marijuana, crashed his 2019 Tesla Model 3 at about 100 mph into a utility pole by an apartment building.

Photo: Corvallis Police Department

The impact was so hard that it caused the Tesla’s chassis-mounted battery packs to break open, sending some of the over 7,000 individual cylindrical battery cells flying, with one landing in a person’s lap in their apartment, and another landing on a bed, where, according to local news station KATU2, the battery set the sheets on fire.

Let’s all just pause here for a moment and let that really sink in: this was a wreck so bad it set someone’s bed on fire.

A wheel from the Tesla also flew into the apartment, rupturing a water pipe and flooding parts of the dwelling.

Photo: Corvallis Police Department

The Corvallis Police and fire departments issued some instructions for anyone who may find an errant battery cell, which they attempted to collect as many as possible, but it’s likely a number are still unaccounted for.

If you’re in the area and find one, here’s what you should know about the batteries:

-Can reportedly stay hot to the touch for up to 24 hours and could cause burns if handled.

-Can release toxic fumes that may harm people and animals if inhaled.

- Can leak substances that may harm people and animals if they are exposed.

Anyone who finds one is asked to call the Corvallis Regional Communication Center at 541-766-6914. “Do not touch the battery,” authorities said. “Corvallis Fire Department personnel will respond to collect the battery for proper disposal.”


It’s a testament to the safety of the Tesla that the driver, Dylan Milota, was able to escape on foot before being caught three blocks away and taken to a hospital.

It’s less of a testament to the Tesla that hot, dangerous batteries were flung around everywhere, but, well, physics are a beast.



This story makes me suspect that I was lied to as a kid. I thought potheads drove like this.