Photo: Dan Istitene (Getty)

While Formula One drivers are probably more familiar with the race weekend experience than most of us will ever be, I can’t say I’ve found them to be particularly good about giving advice re: how to enjoy the weekend as a fan. But McLaren driver Lando Norris? He knows how it’s done. We can all learn a little something from him.

Last weekend, Norris spent the weekend at MotoGP’s British Grand Prix, and I gotta say—he has this whole thing figured out. And it’s awful convenient that he just so happened to announce the three Golden Rules of attending a racing event in the process.

One: Hydrate, You Fools!

If there’s one thing no one does enough at the race track, it’s hydrate. I cannot repeat this enough! Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate! Do whatever it takes: get those liquids into your system. As I’ve said many times before, your goal at the end of the day should be to pee clear.

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Norris illustrates this perfectly with his delightful Valentino Rossi-branded baby bottle. If a baby bottle is what will get you to increase your liquid intake, do what you must. Don’t let anyone judge you. Live your best life.

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Two: Load Up On Merch

Listen. You can go to the track with a budget in mind, telling yourself “I’m not going to spend a paycheck’s worth of money on motorsport merch. I am not going to do it!” I hate to break it to you, but you will still end up doing it.

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Don’t let yourself feel guilty, people! If your little heart so desires that $95-on-a-discount Mercedes sweater, don’t deny yourself! If you love seven of the Indy 500 drivers next year and can’t decide whose shirt to buy, just get one of each!

It may be bad for the wallet, but it is good for the soul. A 46-bedecked Norris says so.

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Three: If It’s Not Nailed Down, It’s Free

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This may, in fact, be the most crucial of all three rules. If it is not somehow nailed down, it is, in fact, yours to take.

Please use your discretion when it comes to taking home the things that are not actually for sale but do not have explicit signs next to them saying ‘do not steal this.’ It it probably best to do this kind of thing when not under any sort of official scrutiny!

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But, for as cool as merch is, there’s nothing better than taking home something that you cannot actually buy, as the many Watkins Glen and ABC Supply 500 signs in my family garage suggest. These particular items also come with the added bonus of all the memories you make while acquiring them—something you can’t turn down.

(If any track personnel ask you about your sign-lifting tendencies, please let them know it was Lando Norris who sent you.)

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Who knew an F1 driver could make his very own contribution to the Race Car Survival Guide on an off weekend? Now that you have been properly educated, go off and enjoy all your races the Lando Norris way.