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For $800, Olaf With Her Head!

Illustration for article titled For $800, Olaf With Her Head!
Nice Price Or No DiceIs this used car a good deal? You decide!

Do-doot-do-do-do-do-do, who likes longroofs? We like longroofs. If you pack a longroof, hack that longroof... Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Volvo 740 turbo isn't half the car it used to be, but that doesn't mean you might not find its price to be full of it.


Think of all the cars and trucks that have been named for rivers. There's Volvo's Amazon, which might have been named for the river, the region, or the tribe of incredibly tall and impossibly sexy women who live there. Aside from that there's pretty much just Ford's Thames, of which we had a wayward - California - edition yesterday. Named for running water or not, only 53% of you ran to vote Nice Price for the 15CWT trucklette.


Of course a win is a win and so we'll bid adieu to that van wishing its seller well in his endeavor. What however will be wished upon the merchant of today's 1991 Volvo 740 turbo longroof? Actually, this Volvo is a long-gone roof as it has had an appointment with Doctor Sawzall and the prescription was to take her top off and call me in the morning.

But wait, you are surely asking, wouldn't excising the roof, an element so integral to a unibody car's structure that its removal would render said car as floppy as a spent porn actor's money-maker? Why yes, I can assure you, it in fact would.

Fortunately, the constructer (de-constructer?) of this open-air bazaar of a Volvo has wisely welded the back doors shut to maintain some semblance of structural rigidity, as well as for the hilarity of watching his drunk friends' attempts at opening them.

Illustration for article titled For $800, Olaf With Her Head!

That penchant for mirth is obvious in the ad as the seller notes that both the beheading and an upgrade to the stereo have been made to 'enhance the driving experience.' One thing to note is that when the roof went away, it seems to have taken the rear-view mirror along with it, meaning that the now unfettered view behind is going to waste.

Aside from the obvious weather, theft, random stranger slug-buggery, and getting a second date while driving it issues, there's a lot to like here. First off, the seller says thats the 195K car runs and drives great. Great! Next there's the opportunity of sticking it to the Man by eschewing the use of of properly-mounted shoulder belts. Take that, Obama!


There's also the note in the ad that the car comes with a clean title, and that title is most likely Sir Chopsalot. In fact, you might think that the only thing puzzling about this fresh air fiend of a 740 is why it's located in Seattle Washington, one of America's top-five cloudiest cities, and one that averages 37 inches of rain a year.

Illustration for article titled For $800, Olaf With Her Head!

In an odd bit of happenstance, the ad claims that the reason forcing the sale is not because the car would serve better in sunnier climes but that the SELLER is getting out of Dodge, and hence needs to get out of this Volvo as well. His witness protection program is someone else's golden opportunity. That is of course if they have a garage or want to relocated the car to the Atacama Desert.

If that's a plan then how about a price? This Volvo is now incomplete and as such you might not expect to pay a full price. Well, currently the asking price is a nominal $800, and even that's open to negotiation. As you would expect looking at the car, the seller's not above taking a little off the top.


What do you think about this crazy topless Volvo and its $800 price tag? Does that seem like a fair price for a fair-weather friend of a car? Or, is there a lot more cutting that needs to go on before this thing's a good deal?

You decide!


Seattle Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to patd67 for the hook up!

Help me out with NPOCP. Click here to send a me a fixed-price tip, and remember to include your Kinja handle.

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Maybe it's welded. Maybe it's JB Weld. Only the seller knows.