For $3,500, We Have Nothing To Fiero But Fiero Itself

Illustration for article titled For $3,500, We Have Nothing To Fiero But Fiero Itself

Sadly, in its stock incarnation Pontiac’s Fiero just doesn’t seem to get any respect. Today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe custom is a prime example of that fact, but will you find its price to be respectable?


Speaking of being decent and well thought-of, it seems that 74% of you felt that paying the fifty-five hundred asking price for yesterday’s short story about a Toyota Corolla would sully one’s reputation.

Are-Eee-Ess-Pee-Eee-Cee-Tee, baby what that means to me. What today’s open top Fiero means to you will have a lot to do with how you feel about America’s only series production mid-engine car and the necessity for keeping it in its stock form. Should you however see it as a canvas for your own imagination - or someone else’s, should you be intransigently shiftless - then this white-on-rice one-off might be your cup of tea.

Why would you want an existing custom should you desire to make the car an expression of your own personal taste and vision? Well, like any great work of art, this one's not necessarily finished, and as George Lucas monkeying with the classic Star Wars films has taught us, it's never too late to mess with success.

To that end, the seller of this Fiero - who is doing so "for a friend" - has offered a handy Photoshop of what the car would look like without its freakishly tall bi-wing spoiler. Hacking that off would make the car able to fit though a standard mail slot, or under your typical 18-wheeler trailer, but I think it lends too much personality to warrant amputation.


What has been removed is the Fiero's roof and flying buttress-surrounded rear window, leaving the car an unfortunate choice for escape should Hitchcock's The Birds ever become reality. Remember, they go for the eyes!

The friend in deed says that the frame has been reinforced, as have the axles to account for the added torque from the "stock" motor. That mill seems to the the six and not the iron Puke, so the car has that going for it. In the minus column, it looks like from the video provided that this one's an automatic and strapping a three-speed slusher to a Fiero will sap the fun faster than having your mom walk in on you while you are pleasuring yourself to a Smurfs video.

There are 108,000 miles on the car and it is claimed to have been in storage for some time so as not to scare children. The ad claims that it runs well and sounds cool owing to its non-stock mufflering, and as you saw in the video, the driver's seat is Darth Vader.


What's left unspoken are the car's year, who did the work, or just how serious an inquiry needs to be considering the presentation of the car. Also, why is it sticking out its tongue?

Illustration for article titled For $3,500, We Have Nothing To Fiero But Fiero Itself

It seems like owning a Fiero demands an obsession with body modification on the level of Heidi Montag's husband. Plus, the car's plastic screwed-on bodywork would have only needed to come with a zipper to be easier to remove so it's not all that shocking to see one in this custom state.

The question however is which direction that customization moves the needle in regards to the car's value. At present, the seller - or his friend at least - has set the price at $3,500. What do you think, is that a deal for this fabricated Fiero? Or, is this a custom with a cuss-worthy price?


You decide!


Indianapolis Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to Cesavice for the hookup!

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Fieros are so easy to work on and mod, that there is no excuse for doing it poorly.

How stupid do you have to be to mess one up this bad? Cripes. What a waste of a chassis. Irretrievably Crack Pipe.