What is it about Florida that makes people want to masturbate all the time? If I were a palm hair removal cream salesman, I know where I'd concentrate my efforts. This latest Florida highway masturbator story is a perfect example of why.
When Glynn Black's truck broke down on I-10, a police officer stopped to see if he needed help. But the cop noticed that Black seemed nervous and anxious for him to go away — he was fidgeting and his eyes were darting back and forth. There was a woman in the car with black whose story about needing help for the broken pickup didn't match up with Black's.
It turns out that the pair had only met that day at a mutual friend's house, and Black had promised the woman a ride to Pensacola. She told the police that Black began the journey by stopping at a rest stop for a 20-minute bathroom break before setting out in the wrong direction on the interstate. She said he then stopped at another rest stop, where he fondled her breasts and whipped out his junk for a little self pleasure, allegedly muttering something about payment for the ride as he stroked away. The passenger-side door was broken, so the woman was a captive audience, so to speak.
Apparently, he stopped when she began crying, and took off again, this time in the right direction. But they didn't get far before Black's truck broke down.
Naturally, methamphetamines were at the heart of the matter. When the cops arrived, they found that not only did Black not have a license, but also had a pocket full of ammo and a bunch of meth-making gear in his truck. He's in jail now, in Florida, where he's more likely than other places to meet more than one person who's in the clink for the same thing.
Photo credit: Shutterstock; Santa Rosa County Sheriff's Office