Dartz Armors 6-Wheel G-Wagen Against Good Taste, Makes Rap Video

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Dartz, the Russian car company made from the chemically distilled, depraved desires of Russia's wealthiest degenerates, is at it again. Previously known for using whale penis leather in their SUVs, they're now leveraging the appeal of another colossal dick: Vladimir Putin.

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That video up there is for the Dartz-produced track Go Hard Like Vladimir Putin, and it looks sort of like it may have been made in PowerPoint, or perhaps Shockwave v.8 in 1998. Lots of still images sliding around, a little bit of very simple animation. The video was made to promote their new vehicle that's been "SkyRocketed by DARTZ," the 6x6 G-Wagen. There is a nice cameo by a Zaporozets 969 in the video, though.

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It appears this new line is based on the car made for

"Owner "bad boy" from one of Latin countries wanna to get smaaall Die Hard 5 style "MRAP"."

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... which is how they described whoever ordered the first of the six-wheeled brutes. I guess they figured there's plenty of other owner-bad boys out there willing to shell out 2.4 million Euros in an effort to permanently shield themselves from the twin-headed dragon of taste and decency, and, if they can't fight it off, then the 1000 HP motor should be enough to outrun even the most persistent agents of dignity.

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Dartz' website for this line of 6x6 wealth-tanks looks and works a lot like a 1999 Angelfire website, but it does manage to show the three main variants available: Urban, Desert, and Red Russian. They're all Soviet weaponized bonkerzonium.

Seriously, who's buying these things? Trying to imagine the sort of person who wants to have a vivid red armored military vehicle patterned with Leningrad-grandma wallpaper and instruments with more gold and encrusted jewels than a Pharaoh's sarcophagus conjures up images of strange men with vacant eyes who would pay to have a baby rhino stolen so they could make cocktails from its blood, just because.

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Also, like every other Dartz vehicle, it comes with two bottles of the world's most expensive vodka, Russo-Baltique. Here's what they say about the flask it comes in:

The vodka flask is a replica of the radiator guard used for the Russo-Baltique cars, and it's made from gold coins minted between 1908 and 1912. This is around the time the company manufactured its first car. The flask cap is made from white and yellow gold and contains a diamond-encrusted replica of the Russian Imperial Eagle. And the bottle itself is made of bulletproof glass 30cm thick.

Last year, a bottle retailed for £790,000. It is not a meant to be drunk, the company explains - instead it should be displayed as art.

The flask cap is made from white and yellow gold and contains a diamond-encrusted replica of the Russian Imperial Eagle.

And finally, the bottle itself is made of bulletproof glass 30cm thick - just in case.

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So, a diamond-encrusted and gold-trimmed bullet-proof bottle of vodka you can never drink? That sounds like the perfect analogue to these insane cars.