They always say the more the merrier, and seeing as today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe Audi A4 has not one but two turbos on its swapped-in V6 you would imagine it’s pretty merry. We’ll have to decide if that merriment is in any way diminished by its price.
There’s a lot of crazy going on in the world these days. As an example, you’ve got corncobs full of ready to pop crazy in the anti-maskers shouting about their freedoms—who then catch the coronavirus and kick the bucket. Then there’s the whole group of Toyota pickup sellers who seem to think their trucks are either made of precious metals or can grant three wishes, and have priced them accordingly.
We looked at one such truck yesterday, and that 1980 Toyota 4X4 pickup did have a number of attractive attributes. It also had a $7,500 asking price and if you’ve stuck with us through this week so far you’ll know that for that much you can buy yourself a pretty nice Range Rover. Most of you felt the Toyota too pricy and it fell in a sizable 80 percent Crack Pipe loss.
Have you ever seen one of those trite teen ugly duckling comedies? Those are the ones where, in a big reveal, the female lead shows everyone how truly beautiful she is simply by taking off her glasses and letting down her ponytail. Beforehand: anonymous high school art nerd. Afterward: Rachael Leigh Cooke. Boom.
I hate to admit it but today’s 2006 Audi A4 Quattro is, in some ways, that under-appreciated amazing individual masked by a pair of baggy overalls and thin veneer of self-unawareness. And with this Audi, there’s no misogynistic undertone! Allow me to explain.
You see, while appearing unassuming, this Audi isn’t your standard A4. It’s been imbued with a number of S4 parts and a 250 horsepower biturbo V6 out of a prior generation car. That, added to the six-speed/Quattro drivetrain should make for an entertaining ride. The best part? Aside from the backend view, nobody needs to be any the wiser as to this Audi’s motives. See? It’s still got its ponytail and glasses.
The car is painted in Tornadorot and rolls on matte black factory alloys. Behind those sit aftermarket Koni dampers and lowering springs. The car does sit lower than stock, but it’s not crazy low. All the bodywork looks to be in perfectly serviceable shape and features a DTM rear bumper cap and defuser that wraps around its four-pipe exhaust nicely.
The interior has a number of S4 parts too, including white leather seats front and rear. It also has an S4 instrument pod that the seller claims has been professionally recalibrated. More gauges live on the dash, and even in the double-DIN stereo which apparently features an Android operating system and can run stuff like Carista. Everything seems to be in working shape and with no noticeable wear and tear on the upholstery, carbon fiber-pattern trim, or plastics.
Of course, this is all leading up to the main event. That is the 2.7-litre V6 that now calls this Audi home. That’s said to sport 100K while the chassis beneath has done a mere 83,000. That was the engine that powered the B5 S4 but by the time of the B7 Audi had dropped it in favor of the crazy backward cam-drive 4.2-litre V8. That engine put out more ponies but had major issues with cheap chain guides and the huge expense that fixing them demanded.
The 2.7-litre has its own quirks and is packed into the Audi’s engine bay tighter than a Kardashian in Spandex. To the installer’s credit, the swap does look to have been successfully achieved with no apparent corners cut.
The engine does its thing through a custom exhaust made up of 3-inch pipes and a high-flow cat. On the intake side, the pressure pipes have all been upgraded to silicone couplers.
What’s described as a “Stage 2 ECU tune” runs the show and it sends the ponies to the six-speed manual through an upgraded Luk RS4 clutch. Everything—A/C, ABS, Traction Control—is claimed to still work as it should making this a turn-key car.
To turn that key, you’ll need to come up with $8,900 as that is what the seller wants for this work of Audi art. Would you go that much for this masked marvel of an A4? Or, is that too much to live with a car that’s only kinda/sorta an S4?
H/T to FauxShizzle for the hookup!
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