If you screw up a burnout you're going to have to hide your head in shame for a few weeks, but Jalopnik readers knows when they're done right there's little on this planet more satisfying than some well-timed carbon gasification.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day — our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers.
Photo Credit: IgotsmeaMetro
10.) RX-7 Commits Suicide by Burnout
Suggested By: Sergio526
Why it's bitchin': For a samurai, harakiri is an honorable form of suicide. We can't be certain that this RX-7 is about to fall into the hands of its enemies, it certainly dies an honorable death, killing itself during a massive burnout.
9.) Mercury Cougar Plays at an Office Park
Suggested By: dpomeroy455
Why it's bitchin': Here we see a wild Cougar in its natural habitat, playing on some tarmac with wide open spaces and no traffic. The cameraman caught the Cougar doing what Cougars do best, which is shredding tires, smoking, and spinning around. Slightly higher quality and this could've just as well come from Planet Earth.
8.) FWD Minivan Burnout
Suggested By: mike553
Why it's bitchin': The minivan is as cool as it is unpractical. Which is to say, it's really not cool at all. That said, seeing something this uncool do something as badass as a massive FWD burnout up a hill is awesome in a creepy sort of way, like watching a dog walk on its hind legs or catching your grandparents texting.
7.) Aussie Ute Burnout
Suggested By: ruquik
Why it's bitchin': Utes are uniquely popular in Australia and are inherently righteous vehicles. They're big, RWD, V8 sedans that have a pickup bed instead of backseats and a trunk. That makes for a sense of ass-lightness and derring-do.
Seeing this badass car do a burnout that devolves into donuts is like the badass burnout squared.
6.) Ford F-450 Burnout by Tanner Foust
Suggested By: farmerengineer4life
Why it's bitchin': The premise of this video is that the Top Gear USA crew is doing burnouts in pickup trucks to find the torquiest in the 50 states. Shaky science aside, Tanner Foust shows off his superior driving skills by literally going in circles around the other two presenters, while doing a burnout in a dually. America, indeed.
5.) Diesel Volvo Burnout
Suggested By: Rytis B
Why it's bitchin': This is like the ying-yang of badass burnouts. Obviously there's the intersection of black diesel smoke and white tire smoke, but there's also the awesome joining of Volvo and huge burnout, which is equally fun to watch. It might only be weirder if the Volvo were an XC90 and the driver were a yuppie soccer mom.
4.) Impala Leaves Road On Fire
Suggested By: NevynPA
Why it's bitchin': This is a classic, Back to the Future, scorched earth style burnout. Straightforward, simple, and executed with classic American muscle. The pavement will be feeling this one for a few days.
3.) Shelby Cobra Burnout…Inside
Suggested By: CodyDUBZ35
Why it's bitchin': A burnout in a Shelby Cobra is already cool, thanks to the intrinsic qualities of the burnout and the Shelby Cobra. What makes this one so special is that it quickly devolves into donuts and its done inside on (formerly) nice hardwood flooring. That takes some major cajones.
2.) Ram Charger Destroys Its Tires
Suggested By: Stig-a-saw-us wrecks
Why it's bitchin': If a camo-patterned Ram Charger is nearly as patriotic as a flag on the Fourth of July, this video of one doing a burnout until its rims are literally on fire should be our new national anthem. Or at least make it our national YouTube video.
1.) Triple Decker Burnout
Suggested By: Cisco-Kid
Why it's bitchin': This is a motorcycle doing a burnout in the back of a ute doing a burnout on the bed of a truck doing a burnout on the ground. It's like the inception of burnouts. Words cannot adequately describe all the kinds of badass this is.