Rich people: Who are they, and how do they keep taking our money? More importantly, what do they drive? Come check out the top ten cars identified by Jalopnik readers as being the top cars all those snot-nosed adolescents wish they were driving.
Welcome back to Answers of the Day — our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!
Photo Credit: Ed Callow
10.) McLaren-Mercedes SLR
Suggested By: Kiwi_Commander
Why it's divine: Nothing says, "I have more money than you" quite like an SLR. The only problem is that if Mr./Ms. Moneybags Junior crashes such an in-your-face exotic, chances are he's going to become an Internet meme. Given that such a crash is inevitable, he can look forward to being a future SLR guy, or the antagonist in a rage comic.
Photo Credit: Jalopnik
9.) Camaro SS
Suggested By: shpuker
Why it's divine: For some reason, America sort of fell for the new Camaro. Housewives buy them, rappers buy them, everybody buys them. Why not get your dumbass kid in on some of that action? After all, that chain of laundromats didn't expand throughout Bergen County, New Jersey for nothing.
Photo Credit: Ciorra Photography
8.) Buick Century
Suggested By: ash78
Why it's divine: Not all rich people are supercar-buying nouveau riche types. Reader ash78 explains what the old money gets for their kids to drive.
Rich: Dad's old Buick Century because I'll be damned if you think you're going to use what I worked for to impress your friends. Don't wreck it and in 3 years we'll think about something else. For every dollar you save, your mom and I will match zero dollars. How does that sound?
Photo Credit: Buick
7.) Subaru Impreza STI
Suggested By: nurik.xix
Why it's divine: The Subaru Impreza STI is a perfect rich kid's ride not only because it appeals to the kid, but also because it appeals to the parents. You get to pretend like you want one because it'll be safe, reliable and good in the snow. Really, you're just waiting to give it a dropped-down stance and go cruising around town, eyeing the lower classes from under your Ken Block flat-brimmed cap.
Photo Credit: Charles Siritho
6.) Ford Mustang
Suggested By: DukeofBirnam
Why it's divine: Rich kids have been buying Mustangs for years, and every time a new one comes out, you can find them in countless high school parking lots, often with window louvers tacked on for some semblance of originality. While Mustangs don't exactly speak to the black-AMEX-and-country-club rich, there's still enough upper-middle wealth in this country to support a healthy population of poseur Mustang drivers, darting from McMansion to McMansion, picking up assorted K-hole floozies along the way.
Photo Credit: Ed Callow
5.) Range Rover
Suggested By: Stapleface
Why it's divine: How the hell else am I supposed to tow my polo ponies around Palm Beach, mom? What do you think I am, some white-trash farmer? This Range Rover isn't a luxury; it's a necessity.
Photo Credit: Ed Callow
4.) Dodge Viper
Suggested By: Adidac425
Why it's divine: With a Viper, the kid's inevitable crash is just going to come sooner. Better to get the supercar jitters out of them early so they can settle into something nice and sensible like a fully-loaded BMW by the time their 17th birthday rolls around.
Photo Credit: Brendan Lester
3.) A full-size pickup
Suggested By: Reptawr
Why it's divine: Not that pickup trucks can't be used for, like, farming or whatever, but they also fit into every kind of wealthy home. For the small-town rich, there's a factory-fresh F-250 4x4 waiting in the driveway. For the more substantially wealthy, there are lift kits and prerunner packages, plus desert crashes and lawsuits. For the ultra rich, there's gold-plating and teak-lined beds. Something for everyone!
Photo Credit: Ebrahim Alawadi
2.) BMW 335i Convertible
Suggested By: ChiefPontiaxe
Why it's divine: It's easy to say that any BMW is perfect upper-class transportation, providing some speed, plenty of snob appeal, and a simple structure for improvement. Work your way up to an M3, then an M5, and then a 7-series. There's more to it than that, as mechanicalTurk explains:
See, most people forget that it has to be a convertible, but what's the point of having a BMW if no one can see you driving it? The convertible thing is doubly true in places where convertible season is shortest.
Photo Credit: x86x86
1.) Lamborghini Gallardo
Suggested By: geistkoenig
Why it's divine: In rich-person talk, that's pronounced "gah-LARD-oh." There's no question that Lambos are at the very pinnacle of new-rich desirability. And with the new rich just getting new richer every day, getting a kid a Lamborghini isn't the cocaine-fueled pipe dream of yesteryear. The delusional rich parent even sees the entry-level Gallardo as encouragement to work hard and stay in school. "Maybe someday," they say, "if you apply yourself at the University of Miami, you'll get an Aventador."
Photo Credit: Ciorra Photography