Automotive technology has never been better, cooler, or more efficient, but there’s still a long way to go before we can claim to have mastered the art form. This week, I asked the fine readers of Jalopnik to use their brains and dream up some nonexistent features they wish their vehicles had. We got a little bit of everything, from innovative ways to avoid door dents to having AI built into the car to talk about your feelings.
Since vehicles nowadays are such dull blobs and boxes, make a vehicle which is capable of easily affixing new skins to change the car’s styling.
I’m imagining that owners would use a CAD program on their PC that comes with the component’s mounting dimensions canned in the program. IE: the quarter panel’s mounting points are set—it’s up to the owner to give the skin the shape which the owner wants to impart upon his ride. And when the owner designed the left quarter panel skin, the CAD program would automatically generate the mirror image, the right quarter panel, so the two sides are perfectly mirrored.
Then the quarter panel skins, door skins, grille, or whatever would be printed out. The owner would then have the panels sanded, skimmed, and painted before they’re affixed to the car. Get tired of the look, go design some new skins—maybe bring fins back to the quarter panels...go effing nuts.
Suggested by the1969DodgeChargerFan
Flying. The ability to take off vertically and fly over traffic. Imagine taking from a traffic jam and then landing on the top level of a parking structure in any downtown metro area when everyone else is still sitting still in traffic.
Suggested by PDM33
How about a cloaking device to make me invisible to radar, lidar and all other types of police surveillance?
Suggested by Earthbound Misfit I
That 50 MPG carburetor that every boomer says GM has locked away in a vault next to the Roswell aliens.
A reflective parabolic surface that raises up from the trunk area to both block the high beams from the asshole behind you while also giving them a taste of their own medicine.
Suggested by Jeff D.
Sliding doors (like on a minivan) on everything = No more door dings in crowded parking lots, and plenty of room for ingress/egress of passengers and cargo.
Suggested by Grasscatcher2
I want all cars to be networked. In this day and age, it is silly that we still see multi-car pileups on the highway because of fog. If a car 10 spots in front of me in heavy traffic SLAMS on the brakes, that should be relayed to all the other cars behind it so that ours can do the same. If I am in stop-and-go traffic, my car should be able to maintain its position largely without my intervention.
Also, we have brake lights and turn signals to indicate what we are doing to other drivers, why not an accelerator light?
Suggested by PostOMatic2000
I want transparent LCD technology on the front sun visor area of the windshield and the entire rear window.
Where, I can put up words and phrases. On the back, normally, and on the front visor, they’d be reversed so the car in front could easily read them glancing in their mirror.
You know, stuff like:
“Is your turn signal broken?”
“Are you having an emergency? Or do you always drive like an asshole?”
“Get any closer up my rear, and you might as well give me a prostate exam while you’re there.”
And, so on.
Suggested by Knyte
Wax impregnated clearcoat and/or some sort of finish which allows for easier cleaning of a car. There is a redwood near my driveway which leaves little red splotches on all my cars...they require a whole lotta elbow grease to get them to come off.
Suggested by SantaCruzin6
A fold-up car like George Jetson’s, that I can pack up in a suitcase and bring with me. No more parking dings in my doors
Suggested by edu-petrolhead
I have two:
1) A button that lets me seize the engine of some unsavory person who cut me off.
But what I really need is:
2) An AI therapist that chimes in with soothing affirmations when the stuff happens that I wish in #1.
Suggested by radioout
Properly insulated trunk (or cargo area), which can be cooled separately with the vehicle’s A/C system on demand.
Suggested by towman
I just paintball your windshield. Tailgating me in the middle lanes? good luck seeing! Your headlights are too bright? I’ll dim them for you =). I’ll keep the missiles, but instead they shoot roman candles at people who can’t maintain their speed
Suggested by darthspartan117