Mysterious Ooze Claims Metro Detroit Street As Its Home Now

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Metro Detroiters already have to deal with crumbling roads, high insurance and drivers who don’t know how to handle four way stops. (Seriously, get it together Michiganders.) But disgusting mystery ooze? That’s a new one.

Last week’s sludge is apparently the second appearance of gross stuff bubbling out of the ground and slowly dripping down Schaefer Highway on the Detroit-Melvindale border. A mysterious substance showed up a week previously in the same location, as ClickOnDetroit reports, but street cleaners just swept it away. This time officials decided to take a closer look, with cops blocking off part of Schaefer while the Detroit Water and Sewage department took samples of the pungent mysterious foam

Officials questioned representatives at the nearby Marathon refinery, but they claimed the stinky substance isn’t a byproduct of the refinery’s activities. The sample is now with Department of Environmental Quality to determine if the substance is hazardous.

So there you have it. Add gross, unexplainable junk just coming up out of the ground and claiming the streets to the long list of dangers faced by Metro Detroiters everyday.

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Luckily, America learned long ago how to fight this scourge: