This is The Morning Shift, our one-stop daily roundup of all the auto news that's actually important — all in one place at 9:00 AM. Or, you could spend all day waiting for other sites to parse it out to you one story at a time. Isn't your time more important?

With gas prices at $7,50 a gallon, it doesn't make too much sense to have an American car in Europe. I guess that's why Detroit tries to sneak into the old continent with Chryslers rebadged as Lancias these days.

Many cars have stereotypes, and typically Hummer owners and drivers are thought of as being selfish, uncaring people. That's mainly because they are driving a car that drinks gas like Natty Light at a fraternity rush.

"Who Dares Wins," or so goes the motto of Sayeret Matkal, one of the Israel Defense Force's special units. Israeli truck customizer AIL of Nazareth has dared with the Jeep J8-based Storm 3 Type R, and it looks like they may win... a lucrative army contract, that is.

I'm speechless here. WTF is this? One could assume it's a simple "America, F@#$% Yeah!" perversion, but this goes beyond that, deep into the realm of a troubled human psyche.

Wrapping your car is supposed to be an affordable alternative to the time consuming and often expensive process of repainting your car. Whenever you get sick of the wrap you can have it removed and your car will return to its pre-wrap appearance—at least that is the idea.

Last month, a Washington State Fish and Wildlife Police Sergeant found a stolen Hummer H2 abandoned in a lake, having broken through six inches of solid ice. Just like some intrepid Hungarians, American robbers can't stop sinking H2s.

Last week’s ridiculous Hummer accident in Hungary has, predictably, become the pictorial meme in these still-frozen parts. Apart from a well-executed and faithful tribute in Lego, this obligatory Star Wars AT-AT version may be our favorite.

Eastern Europe has been under a Siberian spell for a week or so, prompting the owner of a Hummer H2 to test the six inches of ice on Hungary’s Lake Balaton for some Siberian-style winter driving. What he apparently forgot was that a few days of 10-degree weather does not magically turn Lake Balaton into Lake Baikal.

Would you believe that a MINI won the Dakar rally this year? Perhaps a car brand that's as far from its roots in purposeful simplicity is a fitting metaphor for a rally named after a place in Africa that, for the first time this year, entered Peru.