Won't Someone Save This '68 Corona From The Cruel Jaws of The Crusher?

Illustration for article titled Wont Someone Save This 68 Corona From The Cruel Jaws of The Crusher?

OK, all you guys who wail and gnash your teeth every time you see a Junkyard Find that "should have been saved," here's your chance to walk the walk! If this classic Toyota doesn't sell, like, now, it's getting scrapped.

Advertisement
Illustration for article titled Wont Someone Save This 68 Corona From The Cruel Jaws of The Crusher?

You've seen this Oakland DOTSBE honoree before, and it runs and drives just fine. It's got black plates, three-on-the tree manual trans, a bench seat, stereo, and a lowering job. Why is it doomed? Well, the owner- who's one of those Alfa Romeo freakos that hangs around in the California Melee/24 Hours Of LeMons milieu- has so many Hell Projects that he's forced to stack them with a forklift, and he's being made to feel pressure from Forces Beyond His Control. The commissars of the Bay Area Air Quality Management District will pay $1,000 for a running, registered, pre-1989 vehicle, as part of their sinister agenda to contaminate our precious bodily fluids and send our grandparents before Death Panels, where they'll be rendered into fertilizer for organic bok choy farms. He doesn't want to do it, but landlords and spouses have a way of putting a car freak's nodules in the ol' vise and giving the handle a few cranks, so any offer somewhere close to a grand will get you this not-so-hellish project car.
[Craigslist San Francisco]

Advertisement

Share This Story

Get our newsletter

DISCUSSION

murilee-martin-old
Murilee Martin

The reason the San Francisco and Los Angeles areas have car-buyback programs is that they're required to meet federal air-quality standards (under laws enacted during noted liberal Richard Nixon's watch). Failure to meet the standards means withholding of federal bucks. Because of the unique geographical/meteorological features of the Bay Area and LA basin (both of which tend to trap pollutants for long periods), it's damn near impossible to meet those standards... and old cars take the brunt of the regulations because other major sources of hydrocarbon/nitrogen oxide/etc pollution tend to be politically untouchable (e.g., container ships under foreign registry- which bring all that crap from China to your local red-state Wal-Mart via ports like Long Beach, San Pedro, and Oakland- agricultural pumps, etc) or too difficult to regulate (e.g., leaf blowers, fireplaces). Turning this extremely complicated issue into your classic NPR-versus-Rush/liberal-versus-conservative debate is pretty fucking stupid; a better way to approach the subject might be to ask questions such as "Why do we care about clean air?" or "Why don't the folks who love old cars have the clout in Sacramento to force air-quality districts to look elsewhere for that 0.003% reduction in emissions?"