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Who The Hell Robs An Ice Cream Truck With A Rifle?

Truck YeahThe trucks are good!

It’s hot outside. How do you feel better about it? You buy yourself an ice cream from the ice cream truck! Or—even better—have someone else buy you an ice cream. Under no circumstance should you ever rob an ice cream truck, because that’s pretty much on a par with punching a puppy in the face.


Apparently nobody told the robber that did exactly that, according to DNAinfo, which reported a suspect who robbed an ice cream truck with a rifle in a Chicago neighborhood last weekend. The website said that a man pulled up in a car and snuck up to the ice cream man.

From the story:

“He pulled over, got out, just walked up, and he was talking to him for a while kind of calmly before he pointed the gun at him,” said a witness, who asked to remain anonymous. “The driver was kind of confused. He was like ‘what are you asking me?’”

The robber then turned the gun on a man waiting at the truck’s window to buy ice cream.

“What are you looking at?” the thief asked him, according to the witness.

During the robbery, the gunman ordered the ice cream man to throw his keys out of the truck, the witness said. The driver followed the instructions, and the gunman grabbed the money and drove off in the car he arrived in.


To add insult to injury, this happened in a neighborhood with a lot of kids. What has the world come to? That’s basically declaring war on happiness and smiles. How much money do you expect to rob from an ice cream truck, anyway? Spider-Man pops and ice cream sandwiches aren’t exactly high-priced goods.

Thankfully, the victim, a veteran ice cream truck driver of 20 years, has gone back to his usual spot only days after the incident occurred. “You just have to keep going,” he said.

Who the fuck robs an ice cream truck? No, I’m actually asking, because I have no idea and neither do the local police.

If you know anything about this, you can call the area detectives at 312-744-8263.

Writer at Jalopnik and consumer of many noodles.

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Where is this guy when you need him?