What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?

Illustration for article titled What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?

Automotive stock photography is exceptionally strange, especially the older and more European it gets. In this ongoing Jalopnik expose, we attempt to decipher exactly what the hell is going on.

Illustration for article titled What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?

"By combining our sales floor and repair center into one room, we pass the savings onto YOU!"

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Illustration for article titled What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?

"It took years to find the cone that killed my father. Now it's going to pay."

Illustration for article titled What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?

"And that's where we'll buy even more matching sweaters."

Illustration for article titled What The Hell Is Going On In These Automotive Stock Photos?
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"Think if we ask nicely, the dealership will give us the rest of the car?"

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"Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"

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It's more fun if you imagine them running away from zombies.

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"DAMMIT GINA GET OFF THE PORSCHES"

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"Bill, I told you if you brought home another Citroën Ami I'd rip your eyeballs out of your skull. Shit's about to get real."

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"So which broken one you want to buy?"