In the '40s, factories were churning out superheroes by the hundreds. Now, nothing. Let's do something about that. Today's superhero knows how to squeeze a dollar, so pick a sub-$40,000 car and invent a superhero who would drive it.
By the 1960s, we were losing the superhero race, producing shoddy, inferior products like DC's Matter-Eater Lad (pictured). His superpowers? He could eat matter of all forms. Really? A guy who could eat a TV dinner, foil and all, and shoes and wristwatches and plutonium? Nice one, fatso America.
But now we have the opportunity to redefine the superhero for the austerity decade. Who will step up to defend this great land against sub-prime mortgages, trans-fats and obese children chomping down Mc Nuggets like pudgy little Hoover uprights. Name the superhero who will drive responsibly, while seeing to every one of the manufacturer's recommended maintenance intervals. Or not.
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