Do not merely drive in to the median, my beautiful jabroni Mustang-owning friends. Drive over the median.
Here’s a video from the 4x4 Proving Grounds Mega Truck races, which is a real gem. Ever seen a monster El Camino? Now you have. But I’d like to draw your attention to the Mustang at 10:12 in the video.
For some of you, the temptation to peel out of car shows like a basic bro is too great. You will go off-roading as a result, but the V6 Mustang your mother bought you was not equipped for such activities. This results in bent rims, crushed dreams, Copart listings with “Primary Damage: Undercarriage” in the notes and of course, embarrassing footage on YouTube.
Lead-footed dinguses, I have found your savior: this lifted Mustang. Its body is still the car we all know and love as That Guy’s favorite hooligan-mobile, yet its enormous monster truck tires make it a bit harder to lose control on dry pavement. If you do spin the tires, no big deal! You can hop the curb and bounce into a tree and still probably be okay.
Just don’t bounce into any onlookers. We prefer not to get injured.