This Shirtless Moron Got Locked Inside The BMW He Broke Into

Illustration for article titled This Shirtless Moron Got Locked Inside The BMW He Broke Into

If you ever decide to steal a car, you might want to make sure its owner can't trap you inside with the click of a button. You should also probably be sober and wearing a shirt.


A BMW driver says he caught a would be car thief violating all three of those guidelines when his wife heard the car's alarm going off the other night. Here's his story:

[At] 3:30am, my wife wakes me up, "is that your car alarm going off?" It was. It was parked in the driveway, so I look out the window and see nothing out of the ordinary. I disabled the alarm, and the doors unlocked. Then I see some dude with no shirt on get into my car! I'm thinking "what the fuck". I immedately lock the doors, then double lock/arm. Owned . I tell the wife to call 911, while I go outside and snap a quick cell phone pic of the guy just incase. After the first picture, he started getting pissed off and gave me the finger. I then went into the garage and grabbed my 3lb sledge. I stand next to the driver's door with the sledge in my hand and a very angry look on my face. If he tries to bust his way out of the car, he's getting squashed. The kid is obviously scared shitless, as he doesn't even move or look at me. Cops come and ask how I locked him in the car, and I tell them about the double lock.

The guy was allegedly trapped in there long enough for his captor to snap a picture of him. It turns out that he was probably shitfaced, apparently mumbling something about thinking it was his friend's car when the cops arrived. That was right before he threw up all over the place; outside the car, thankfully.

Photo credit: joey79 on bimmerforum



What if it really was a misunderstanding? What if this guy was just trying to sleep it off in his friends car? What if the moon was made of cheese? What if the Cleveland Indians were better at baseball? What if the female orgasm actually existed?