These Electric Cars Have The Dumbest Names

I’ll take the low-hanging fruit and nominate the Toyota bZ4X. The fact that I had to look up how to spell the “name” of this model pretty much says it all.

iMaGiNe iF aLl aUtOmAkErS wRoTe oUt tHeIr nAmEs tHiS wAy.

Suggested by: paradsecar

Here’s an easy one S E X Y

Elon - who is REALLY my least favorite person (out of half a dozen) as he fellates DeathSentence today.

Because nothing says “sticking it to the establishment” like naming your product slate to make preteens giggle.

Suggested by: sybann

The Taycan TURBO S is one of the dumbest names seeing as how it doesnt have a turbo. I mean its like the days of the old PCs with the turbo button. And it uses the font you’d expect on cake frosting

I had to re-use boneheadotto’s image of a vintage PC up there, because it was too good not to share.

Suggested by: boneheadotto

Any model that’s just an existing nameplate but with “EV” tacked on to it. It makes a little bit of sense when it’s a vehicle that looks much like the non-EV version, but less so when it’s a heavily modified or completely different platform with different styling. Also when it’s a vehicle with no brand cachet. I mean, come on GM, you couldn’t have came up with a different name for the Equinox EV? Blazer EV? Silverado EV? Bring back the Vue name for a small-mid CUV. Everyone knows the Silverado EV should have been the new Avalanche. And the Blazer EV? Call it the Venture. No one remembers that you made a minivan anyway.

Hey — GM worked hard on those names! And the little stack of pancakes replacing the “E” in “Silverado” and “Blazer?” Creative! The regular customer definitely knows those are supposed to be batteries.

Suggested by: dbeach84

Any manufacturer, EV or otherwise, that does the ‘0-10' numbering scheme in order of release and not size or market placement. I’m looking at you Polestar.

The Polestar 4 is smaller than the 3, and the 1 was more expensive than all of them. We need answers.

Suggested by: Amoore100

The #1 modern BEV that had the most hateful name in my book is the Mitsubishi i-MiEV.

And the vehicle it was attached to was also crap.

OK so this one isn’t around anymore, but it made me giggle too much to ignore. Mitsubishi is probably still very proud of the i-MiEV: a car introduced at a time when the mere act of making an EV, no matter the quality, was bold, innovative and convinced people you really cared about the environment.

Suggested by: Manwich - now Keto-Friendly

The Chinese-Brazilian CAOA-Chery iCar. It’s both a dumb name and a juicy lawsuit all in one package:

I’d never heard of this one, but they must have been proud of beating Apple to the name the company would’ve chosen for its first car, had it been released during W’s presidency. Who’s suing Chery first — Tim Cook or Toyota?

Suggested by: edu-petrolhead

Cadillac Celestiq. Just because a weirdo spelling kinda worked for the Lyriq doesn’t mean you can use the device anywhere you damn well please.

At least one marketer at Cadillac firmly believed the -iq suffix applied to regular words would save the brand. I’d bet my life savings on it.

Suggested by: Give Me Tacos or Give Me Death

Something about Subaru Solterra doesn’t quite sit right - Sun, Earth, sounds like someone just grabbed a couple of nebulous eco-related words, Latinized them, and called it a day. I get the Earth portion at least, both the eco cred, and Subaru’s whole outdoorsy thing, but it’s the Sol that really throws me.

aT lEaSt iT’s nOt bZ4X!

Suggested by: Maymar

Jaguar i-Pace. Why was e-Pace chosen as the name for the non-electric vehicle?

This might be the truest one yet. Also, “pace” is a weird word to just drop into a name like that. I can’t explain why.

Suggested by: Matt Longman

Mustang Mach-E.

There, I beat you all to it.

I know it’s not novel to dunk on the Mustang SUV, but they really should have just called this the Mach-E, no ’Stang. Everyone who would’ve cared to “get it” would have, and probably even appreciated the reference. Proponents told us the Mustang badge would save the car, though, and look how that’s working out.

Suggested by: FijiST