These are the Names You Have Given Your Cars

Last Friday, we asked you what names you’ve given your cars, and boy did you deliver. You also shared some legitimately touching stories about vehicles that have carried you through some real life experiences.

Bravo, honestly.

It was hard to pick just a handful of names you’ve submitted, because who am I to judge what you decide to name your cars. These are your cars after all. This was your space to talk about your car and why you gave it a specific name!

So, sit back, relax and leaf through some of the names your fellow Jalopnik community members have given their cars.

“My 2006 Magnum SRT8 is named Pam, after Pam Poovey from Archer.

Why?

• Big girls with big asses
• Drinks a lot
• Loud and obnoxious
• Drive’s surprisingly well for her size”

“My head feels like a bunch of monkeys fighting over a bucket of marbles!”

Pam really rocks, doesn’t she? Easily my favorite Archer character. Man, I miss that show. It really jumped the shark with Archer Vice. Much like the Magnum, I wish it would come back.

Submitted by: Magnum_SRT8

Fellow Z4 owner here! Mine is named Heidi Klum 😁

You... I like you. I’m also deeply jealous of your red interior. Heidi Klum is really a fitting name considering the E85 is both beautiful and German. Good on ya, fella. Love the wheels, too.

Submitted by: BeachHappy

“For the last 34 years she has been known to me as Blue Thunder.”

34 years is such an incomprehensible amount of time for me, I gotta respect it. I’ve never had a car more than like... two years. I get bored too easily. The 240 DL is sweet as shit, though. Blue Thunder really fits it. I’d love to know how this thing gets on with D.C. winters, as well.

Submitted by: bootska

“2001 Saturn SW2, forest green: The Gordmobile. (Was dubbed such when my Dad had it, with the GORD license plate. Name stuck when it was passed down to me.)

2007 Saturn Ion Quad Coupe, red: Faith. (Named after Mirror’s Edge protagonist. Got the eye tattoo under the right headlight and arm tattoos on the sides.)

2017 Chevy Volt, blue: Archangel. (Named after Garrus Vakarian’s codename in Mass Effect 2. Has the emblem in various spots around the car.)“

First of all, I love your commitment to General Motors oddities. I miss Saturn a lot. It reminds me of my childhood, especially SW2 wagons. I swear those things used to be everywhere. They were always that green color or in Jewish Racing Gold. Gordmobile is also an exquisite name for a vehicle.

Submitted by: Boter

“I didn’t name them but my kids did:.

2001 Toyota MR2 - the Funcar - Also No-roof car.

1999 Subaru Legacy Outback - Ol’baru

2014 Subaru Outback -Newbaru

2015 Genesis Coupe - Greycar

Any Firetruck - EEEEEE-whooooo!”

Damn, I cannot believe your kids would lie to you and say they came up with that firetruck name. In actuality, I did back in 1998. I promise you that much. As for the rest of the names, they are so cute. I cannot stand it. Especially Newbaru. I love it.

Submitted by: FutureDoc

“Black Volvo (S70)

White Volvo (S70 x2)

Blue Volvo (S70)

Green Volvo (C70)

Smaller White Volvo (‘00 S40)

Beat Up Volvo (S70)

The Lemons Car (Volvo S70)

Old Volvo (‘58 444)

I like to keep it simple”

I take it you like Volvos, redneckrob.

Submitted by: redneckrob and his flock of Volvos

“I think the only car I’ve ever named was my first, a ‘73 VW Type 3 fastback. It didn’t move very fast, but was a nice place to sit so I called it “my chair”.

What a cool little car/chair you had. It’s an oft-forgotten car with apparently a very comfy driver’s seat. Also, who needs to go anywhere fast when you’ve got a nice place to sit? I totally get it.

Submitted by: dug deep

I typically make a habit of naming my cars. Some names have meaning while others do not.

Meaning:

2008 Volvo S80 - Robyn; named after 90s Swedish pop star Robyn

2012 BMW 328i (E92) - Sabine; named after the late, great, Queen of the Ring Sabine Schmitz

No Meaning:

2003 Infiniti I35 - Aunt Grace; just because

2011 Lexus GX 460 - Olivia; sounds good with my last name202?

Rivian R1T - Vivienne; because rhyming is cool

Vivienne the Rivian is an all-time banger of a name, and I feel you on not everything having meaning. My first car was Sally just ‘cause I liked the name. Aunt Grace also gave me quite a laugh. Someone’s Aunt Grace deserves to have a car named after them. Also respect for Sabine.

Submitted by: askars

Honey: ‘86 Hyundai Excel (Manual, brown, hatchback, a great Jalop 1st car)

 The fucking Sundance: ‘88 Dodge Shadow (yeah, I know)

Max: ‘88 Mitsubishi Might Max

The Surly D-san: ‘99 Nissan Frontier (my IRL title/nickname is The Duke of Surl)

 Blue Stinger: ‘86 Suzuki GS650-L

 The Jeep: ‘99 Jeep Cherokee Limited (see username)

 Zoom Zoom: ‘03 Ford Focus (named by the spawn)

 The Saturn: ‘99 Saturn SL2

Zoom Zoom 2: ‘12 Ford Focus (named by the spawn)

Black Betty: ‘04 Dodge Dakota

42 Wallaby Way: ‘19 Escape

Oscar: ‘07 Saturn Sky

Fucking Sundance is an aces name. Also, I am contacting Mazda to let them know you’ve violated their copyright. Sorry, fella. You should be hearing from their attorney, Bill Mazda, soon.

Suggested by: IstillmissmyXJ

My Celica is called: Celica

My Starlet is called: Starlet

My red Corolla is called: red Corolla

My black Corolla is called: black Corolla

Toyota already named the cars so there’s no need for me to do it

Thanks for the reply.

Suggested By: André Leichtfuß

Favorite named car was when I had a 2004 RX-8 in yellow that due to the lovely high revs my 3 year old son called it “The Angry Banana.”

And of course a bunch of other stuff like the 1984 Honda Accord called “The Brown Bomb,” a silver 06 Mini Cooper S I called “Goliath,” a 97 Acura CL was “The Mobile Snowdrift,” 02 Altima named “Ruby” after the paint, the 13 Chevy Volt named “The Tardis,” an old ass Jeep Cherokee Sport called “Mobile Snowdrift 2,” 04 Audi A6 named “Esmeralda” because she was fancy, silver 04 Mazda3 was “Mr. Bean,” and about a dozen or so more. Currently the 2017 black F-Pace is “Morgana” because she’s British and mean.

I love the idea that the angry spinning Dorito car was also The Angry Banana. You’ve also got another gem in there with Mr. Bean the Mazda3. I love a bean car, and there were so many in that era. A melting bar of soap really just holds up so well stylistically.

Suggested By: Michael I

Current fleet names:

F-250 - “Charlene” (spouse felt that was a good name for a big strong thirsty gal)

SV650 - “Jinx” (used to strand me until I dealt with battery/charging issues)

Buell - “Velma” (named for her wide orange gastank by previous owner)

DR-Z - “Spike” (used to be decorated in punk rock spikes)

Kubota tractor - “George Orangewell” (was made in 1984)

The rest haven’t told me their names yet, and might not ever.

Please share with the group once they tell you their names. It would be rude not too. However, if they’re shy I totally understand. Jalopnik writer Steve DaSilva didn’t tell me his name for the first three months I worked here.

Submitted by: Gubbin

My ‘61 Bug I called Satan, because it was red and had so many problems.

I’m seeing a recurring theme with VW products being the devil. I too had a devil car once: a 2000 VW Passat. The car was broken far more than it ever worked. It was a horrid turd. I miss it, to be honest.

Submitted By: Tom Zizzo

“Used to owna lowered Gen 2 Panda with a ridicolously oversized exhaust. Called it Brummelbär, which translates to grumbly bear.”

I love, love, love the Fiat Panda. It’s so damn cute. I wish I could have one, but unfortuantely, I’m from a place where nice things aren’t allowed. I also admire the Germans for finding ways to make cute names sound so damn scary.

Submitted by: felixthegrumpycat

“1986 Pontiac Parisienne, had for over 10 years and she’s named Eva Brown. Everyone refers to her as the Zeppelin car though.”

BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN. BROWN.

Submitted By: Jer