The Ten Most Embarrassing Things You Can Do Behind The Wheel

Nothing's worse than a brain fart at the wheel, and it's your car that often pays for your momentary stupidity.

10.) Starting a running car


The grinding noise you hear is the slow death of the starter.

You're car is too normal:

I've done this multiple times to my friend's S2000. Damn thing has a key you have to turn AND a start button - use the button to turn it on, the key to turn it off. Stupid me keeps trying to use the button to turn it off.

Suggested By: MrTheEngineer, Photo Credit: Chris Isherwood

9.) Forgetting to turn on your lights


This one is way, way too easy. e30s2k:

Being the oblivious fool driving with all their lights completely off when it's way past sunset/before sunrise.

You honk at them, flash your high beams, turn your lights on and off, wave and motion...nothing works - they just stare straight on ahead twirling their hair, singing along, or totally zoned out....UNTIL they finally realize/wake up and have that look of utter shame on their face.

I was once stuck in traffic behind a lady in a Prius doing this - I kept flashing my high beams at her (fun fact - E30s have ridiculously bright high beams), absolutely zoned out. A few lights up, a cop was also stuck in traffic directly front of her going the other way - he shines his spotlight AT her, and shouts "M'am, for heaven's sake, PLEASE turn on your lights" on his loudspeaker. I'm sure she felt really embarrassed - hopefully a lesson that will stick with her for years to come. People don't realize how difficult it is to see a car with no lights on in the dark.


Suggested By: e30s2k, Photo Credit: Knight Rider

8.) Getting stuck in the wrong lane

We've all been there. Ash78, opposite rock:

Getting stuck in the wrong lane, which even if poorly marked, labels you as a jackass or a non-local to everyone around you. Correction attempts are often futile or downright hostile.


Suggested By: Ash78, opposite rock

7.) Shouting with the windows up


Even if you already have enough problems driving a Monte Carlo, remember to roll down those windows first. themanwithsauce:

I was driving to a friends house and had to make a left turn to a side road. In front of me was a driver's training car, stopped and waiting to turn. The girl behind the wheel started to turn, panicked and was frantically screaming that IT CAN'T MAKE THIS TURN! And was going to be T-boned when the cars caught up to her. It never occurred to her that she could turn the wheel more than just half a turn to the left.......

So I scream on by on the inside in my lightened, loudened 1997 Monte Carlo but not after rolling down my window and having a good point and laugh. I'm sorry, but she was NOT ready for the road.


Suggested By: themanwithsauce, Photo Credit: Shutterstock

6.) Losing a battery along the way


This is an odd one from reader My X-Type is too a real Jag. There are only two options here — your car is either rusted beyond the point of no return, or you seriously forgot something.

A few years ago, the remnants of a tropical storm were hitting Atlanta hard just in time for evening rush hour. Of course this was the day my battery decided to die after work. So I quickly got one of my co-workers to take me to NAPA around the corner, bought a battery, and back to the office.

It was pouring down rain and I was miserable changing the battery with a pair of needle nose pliers and other assorted tools from my computer repair kit. In my haste I decided not to hook the battery tie downs back up, thinking I would do it when I got home inside of my garage. Halfway home, climbing a large hill the battery tipped over, disconnected itself, fell between the radiator and engine, the car bucked, the battery then took out the lower radiator hose and fell on the ground.


Suggested By: My X-Type too is a real Jaguar, Photo Credit: Shutterstock

5.) Getting caught rocking out

On the plus side, maybe Simon Cowell rolls up next to you at the light. Hey, anything is possible.


Suggested By: cazzyodo

4.) Getting caught getting/giving road head


It can be a proud moment, but not if, let's say, children are watching in the other car.

Suggested By: Stig-a-saw-us-wrecked, Photo Credit: AP Images

3.) Forgetting about that extra height


Bicycle? Ski box? A new sofa? Not anymore.


About a week after my family got a Tahoe my dad was loading stuff into the back for a trip to NH. He forgot that the glass raises separately and backed out of the garage. Glass caught the garage door, glass shatters, glass everywhere, mom becomes furious. Good stuff.



A few years ago, on a friday before the holidays, I was leaving the campus with my bike strapped to my 2cv's roof rack. Just before I leaving, I decide to make a left turn in a parking lot to check something in my trunk. What I didn't see (pay attention to) was a crossbar.


Suggested By: live2skico2, Photo Credit: Getty Images

2.) Checking out a girl/guy with unfortunate results


At least get her/his freakin' number! GotWake:

Rear ending someone - while in your Mom's car - while looking at a girl, who you made eye contact with - who saw you maul the rear end of an MG - the MG that just got out of the body shop for a similar fender-bender. Yea, that happened, and I didn't get the girl's phone number - imagine that.


Suggested By: GotWake, Photo Credit: oneras

1.) Stunting gone wrong

You will feel like an idiot, and you probably should.

Suggested By: gla2yyz

Welcome back to Answers of the Day - our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!


Top Photo Credit: F1Saison2013

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