The Ten Instruments That Would Make The Perfect Dashboard

The common speedometer, tachometer and fuel gauge setup works great and all, but road travel would be so much easier if you also had these ten gauges.

10.) ProjectCarometer


Do you ever find yourself chasing issues with your project car and you just keep noticing more and more issues? Do you ever get that feeling that none of what you’re doing is worth it? I know I’ve had that feeling. Many times. This gauge could help. The ProjectCarometer can save you thousands by telling you that it’s time to let go of your project car.

Suggested By: Bob, Photo Credit: John Lloyd via Flickr

9.) Boneometer

As a young bachelor, how convenient would it be if you had a gauge in the middle of the cluster that could tell you which of your passengers of the opposite sex were highly attracted to you? Or better yet, could tell you when they wanted to hook up? I can tell you for a fact that a gauge with those capabilities could definitely make my life a lot easier, and a bit less stressful.

Suggested By: Kaizer Soze, Photo Credit: The Children’s Hospital Of Philadelphia


8.) RacingLineometer


For track use only. A little gauge that shows an arrow pointing you in the direction of the racing line for the track you are on. No instructors needed! Except for braking, throttle, and probably still steering input.

Suggested By: TrumPockets, Photo Credit: Jalopnik

7.) Altimeter


Very few cars on the road are equipped with working altimeters. Why do you need an altimeter in your car? Reader neverspeedawordagain can explain:

I would like to have a super-accurate altimeter and topographical map of the road ahead. Knowing the slope / elevation changes of the road ahead of you is super-useful for hyper-miling, to be able to know how much speed to carry on downhills so that you’re still maintaining sufficient speed on the next uphill rise. Even if the altitude change is only 3 or 4 feet over the course of 100 yards, it definitely helps to be able to keep your engine in the most efficient rev zone. And yes, I hyper-mile my Mustang GT.


Suggested By: neverspeakawordagain, Photo Credit: Getty Images

6.) SpeedTrapometer


We here at Jalopnik do not condone driving illegally or recklessly, but surely it wouldn’t hurt to be able to reliably track where our law enforcement friends are hiding when driving. You know, for those times you’re speeding but you don’t realize that you’re speeding until it’s too late? It happens to the best of us.

Suggested By: burglar can’t heart click anything, Photo Credit: Getty Images via Jalopnik


5.) Burritometer


On extended drives and road trips, decent food might not be easy to come by. Why not try reader For Sweden’s Burritometer? This gauge can detect where the closest open burrito-selling shop is and point you in the correct direction to pick up your burrito. Just remember to eat your burritos in moderation.

Suggested By: For Sweden, Photo Credit: Robby Van Arsdale via Flickr

4.) Red Light Gauge


Wouldn’t it be nice if you could just coast through each green light without worrying if it’s going to change color on you or not? Without the stopping and starting required at every red light, you would barely be using your feet, and as an added bonus, you would also be saving gas. Audi showed off some technology at last year’s CES that could help you with this, but unfortunately it has not yet been widely implemented.


Suggested By: As Du Volant, Photo Credit: thisisbossi via Flickr

3.) Traffic Jam-eter


I couldn’t tell you how much time I would have already saved in my driving career if I had a gauge that could tell me how far backed up traffic could be congested. Not only could it have saved me time, but it also could have from some serious emotional straining.

Suggested By: MrMcQueen21v2, Photo Credit: Gohsuke Takama via Flickr

2.) Pissometer


Imagine having a simple fuel range display gauge, but instead of fuel range, it displayed human bladder range. This gauge would display exact amount of leftover range that your bladder has, so you could easily figure out where a smart bathroom stop could be on a road trip. As far as I’m concerned, that’s a lot better than the bottle method.

Suggested By: StuntmanDan, Photo Credit: Garrett via Flickr

1.) TimingBeltExpectancyometer


This gauge could help save your car’s life. With its ability to display to the driver that the timing chain or belt is soon to fail, you could easily prevent your interference motor from becoming a pile of near-useless metals.

Suggested By: Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken, Photo Credit: Ernesto Andrade via Flickr

Welcome back to Answers of the Day - our daily Jalopnik feature where we take the best ten responses from the previous day’s Question of the Day and shine it up to show off. It’s by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers. Enjoy!


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