These Are The Most Screwed Cars At Burning Man

Despite what the rich people at Burning Man this year may say, things have been a bit of a disaster. Record breaking rains completely flooded the part of the Nevada desert where the annual festival takes place, and it completely fucked up roads.

Folks have been told to shelter in place and not try to leave the grounds. That, uh, didn't exactly happen. While many people did stay put, a few very fine people decided not to heed the warnings of the National Weather Service.

You will not be surprised to learn that a good deal of these folks did not bring the proper vehicle to get through muddy terrain. However, even the people with the right types of vehicles found themselves stuck. That all has to do with the mud below their tires; thick, sticky stuff that can reduce even the most hard-core off-road tire to a slippery cylinder. Nasty stuff, unless you're in a Ram TRX.

Anyway, because I am spiteful, I decided to comb through news footage from the mess and find some of the most fucked people at Burning Man this year. If you have a bad spirit, please enjoy!

A blacked out Range Rover Sport stuck in the mud is probably the best representation of this entire miserable situation. It's the perfect representation of everything else going on at Burning Man.

Getting stuck in deep mud is probably the 10th worst thing about doing the whole Van Life thing. It's gentrified homelessness. Wake up people!

The water guys are moving, but not fast. I do not envy being a contracted water truck driver stuck in the desert because rich fools wanted to do ecstasy and light some wood on fire.

This might be the saddest car at Burning Man. This poor Jetta barely made it out of its parking spot before getting stuck. From what I've read, it was left there for days, unable to move.

It's hard to tell from this image, but the Ram is very much stuck right here. Where is here, you ask? Well it's the middle of an intersection. Absolutely masterful job by this guy.

My favorite part of this imagine is all the footsteps. Someone spent a lot of goddamn time trying to get their Outback out of the mud, but to no success. They were probably dancing around this thing for a couple hours. Big RIP.

This is art, apparently.

It's nice that people are helping each other, but I feel like the biggest help to this whole situation would have been to just stay home. Who am I, though? Burners gotta burn.

I'm not exactly sure what this person did. I see a lot of second guessing in their past. That's bad. You gotta pick your line, keep your momentum up, and forge ahead. You poor, poor fool.

I, uh, don't think that's going to get out anytime soon.

Imagine biffing something so hard you just give up and leave your expensive ass Jeep in the mud.

Even once people were able to get out, they were still stuck in a line of traffic for hours on end. Oh, we do pity the rich, don't we folks?

yeah.