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'The Caprice Wagon's Curvy Lines Are The Kind You Either Love Or Hate'

The '91 Caprice was a lot of car. More than 18 feet long and tipping the scales at 4,300 pounds, it was huge. As John Davis noted, it was also there to show all those dopey minivans everyone was driving who was boss. Plus, at about $97 per inch, what a great buy!


Seriously, aside from its "wind cheating design," this version of the Caprice wagon is a caveman in a Wall Street-banker-who-hasn't-made-it-yet's clothing. It was for the parents who didn't want to be seen in a minivan, but don't mind strutting about in a massive land yacht full of screaming children and cheap camping gear. If I had a brood of children to yell at, I'd drive the shit out of this thing.

But as cool as Cribshitter thinks this iteration of GM's largest full-sized longbody is, the Caprice wagon didn't make it more than five years past Davis' prediction that it would be around for a long time to come. In a way, he was right though. These things make great taxis, and if you've never sat in the folding back seat of one on the way home from a bar at 4 a.m., I highly recommend it.

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I was in middle school when these first came out and even then I thought these had to be about the damned ugliest cars in existence. Huge, bulbous looking things. The rear was the worst part. That said, I felt like a lot of people bought them. A fair number of my friend's parents bought them and one time I went on a camping trip with one of them who's parents bought a Wagon Caprice. To this day it had to be the largest passenger car I've ridden in. Literally a boat on wheels.