It's nearly impossible to make a statement when buying a large European luxury sedan. Buying an A8 instead of a 7-series doesn't mean you prefer dry humping to oral sex or anything of any significance. All it means is you're a rich person, you like big vehicles, you are never going to buy a Cadillac.

The one exception to this is buying an old Duesenberg outfitted with an alligator leather interior and more chrome than a library full of Macbook Pros. Short of that, buying a Maserati Quattroporte at least says you're a little more playful and stylish and probably like some sort of crazy, kinky rich 1%er sex that involves a bengal tiger and a stun gun.

So what of this new Quattroporte? It's crease-ier which is a word spellcheck says I'm just making up but I'm fairly sure is a real word. The ovular grille with the big fuckoff Neptune trident is still there and the wavy greenhouse has been turned down to nine. I'm not sure about the headlights, which look like a pregnant slug but maybe appear better in person.

In profile, always the car's best angle, it looks as long as the line to get into one of Silvio Berlusconi's parties.


Bunga bunga.

Details are scant, but we already know there's going to be another Ferrari-supplied V8 (they provided a photo) and a rumored turbocharged V6.


The car will debut officially at Detroit because Americans have been good Maserati customers. What do you think? Is it an improvement?