Proving Texas is still just one big ridiculous stereotype, Chrysler debuted the Ram Laramie Longhorn luxotruck today. It's got more leather than Max Mosley's basement and silver belt buckle seats. Belt buckle seats! I hate all of you.
So yeah, Dodge now has a super luxury truck to do battle with the Denalis and King Ranch Editions of this world. And they debuted it at the Texas State Fair, which is the same place you can buy Fried Beer and then go look at the world's biggest pair of jeans. Bravo.
It's mostly the same crap you get on other luxury trucks except for those Belt Buckle Seats. Give Dodge credit here, what I'm sure cost them $50 ups the Texana cliche to Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys level. I'll them explain:
Ram Laramie Longhorn edition features unique leather front seatbacks distinguished by flap-closure pockets whose details authentically evoke saddlebags. Each pocket is secured with silver steer-logoed, tooled-metal buckle with a magnetic clasp.
As a proud Texan I'm disappointed you all think you can toss leather everything and gaudy silver tchotchkes on the dash and impress us. As a realistic Texan, I know only like 15% of the many truck drivers here in God's Country use the truck for work and the rest just drive them as status symbols. As a Texan who grew up in the 'Burbs I secretly sort of like it.
Yeah, and I know you're going to say "Dodge Rams are now just Ram" but they're still putting the thing on the Dodge website so we're not going to call it the Ram Ram until they do. And even then maybe not.
Now if you'll excuse me I've got to go have sex with some cattle, eat a few Deep Fried Frito Pies, play with guns, and buy a big ass Dodge truck with an interior tackier than the den of the Southfork Ranch.
Photo Credit: PickupTrucks.com