Prepare For Thanksgiving With This List Of Good Car Arguments You Can Start With Family

One unchanging complaint about Thanksgiving in America is that it's a time that forces many people to have to interact with relatives that have wildly differing opinions, whether politically, ethically, religiously, and so on. And while a variety of points of view and challenging one's own ideas is undeniably healthy, it's easy for holiday gatherings to get out of hand. Luckily, as always, I have a solution, and it involves cars. But it still keeps the arguing you don't even realize you'd miss.

See, it's absurd to think you'll have a Thanksgiving with no arguments that devolve into tearful shouting matches and don't end until a folding chair impacts someone's face, sending geysers of gravy and clumps of stuffing flying around like a condom full of ground beef flung into a window fan—that's just how the holiday is.

But, while I can't remove the fighting—and, really, who would want to deprive the holiday of its most essential charm—what I can do is provide a list of sure-fire automotive-related argument starters that will keep the fighting away from the truly sensitive aspects of your life—who you choose to love, how you express your gender, who won an election, are viruses real, and so on.

So, avoid the real topics and get fighting with your aunts and uncles and weird cousins using these rage-tested car argument starters!

Try them out:

I hope these help your family avoid real arguments about real, important issues. It will be up to you to figure out which side to take in these suggestions, but I promise all have plenty of anger-raising points available from nearly any angle, and you can push and twist most of these to touch on people's sensitive beliefs, all while keeping things safely automotive-focused.