Photo: Chevrolet

Pickup trucks! They carry a lot of people these days. Just look at the Volkswagen Tanoak concept. It seats two up front and three comfortably in the back. That’s a lot of people! What is the correct amount of people? Don’t worry, after much science I have come to the right number.

The correct number is three.

How would these three be configured? Sitting on a bench seat in the cab, of course.

What’s that? You want bucket seats? Get out of here with that nonsense.

You want a second row? No. Second rows are for cars and SUVs.

The purpose of a truck is to carry shit in the bed. You know a good way to make the bed smaller? Adding a second row for more humans, who should think about finding a car better-suited for human travel, not a truck, which is suited for getting shit done.

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Trucks should really only be used on farms and work sites. Weekend warriors who want one to “get stuff done around the house?” Sure, I guess, if you want.

But at least have some dignity and get a truck with a bench seat. The capacity is three. That’s enough!