Pickup Trucks Should Only Seat Three People

Illustration for article titled Pickup Trucks Should Only Seat Three People
Photo: Chevrolet
Truck YeahThe trucks are good!

Pickup trucks! They carry a lot of people these days. Just look at the Volkswagen Tanoak concept. It seats two up front and three comfortably in the back. That’s a lot of people! What is the correct amount of people? Don’t worry, after much science I have come to the right number.

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The correct number is three.

How would these three be configured? Sitting on a bench seat in the cab, of course.

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What’s that? You want bucket seats? Get out of here with that nonsense.

You want a second row? No. Second rows are for cars and SUVs.

The purpose of a truck is to carry shit in the bed. You know a good way to make the bed smaller? Adding a second row for more humans, who should think about finding a car better-suited for human travel, not a truck, which is suited for getting shit done.

Trucks should really only be used on farms and work sites. Weekend warriors who want one to “get stuff done around the house?” Sure, I guess, if you want.

But at least have some dignity and get a truck with a bench seat. The capacity is three. That’s enough!

News Editor at Jalopnik. 2008 Honda Fit Sport.

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DISCUSSION

alanisnking
Alanis King

Erik my friend have you been to Texas? Trucks are mainly for driving from your home, in the city, to your desk job, also in the city.