Pickup Trucks Should Only Seat Three People

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Pickup trucks! They carry a lot of people these days. Just look at the Volkswagen Tanoak concept. It seats two up front and three comfortably in the back. That’s a lot of people! What is the correct amount of people? Don’t worry, after much science I have come to the right number.

The correct number is three.

How would these three be configured? Sitting on a bench seat in the cab, of course.


What’s that? You want bucket seats? Get out of here with that nonsense.

You want a second row? No. Second rows are for cars and SUVs.

The purpose of a truck is to carry shit in the bed. You know a good way to make the bed smaller? Adding a second row for more humans, who should think about finding a car better-suited for human travel, not a truck, which is suited for getting shit done.


Trucks should really only be used on farms and work sites. Weekend warriors who want one to “get stuff done around the house?” Sure, I guess, if you want.

But at least have some dignity and get a truck with a bench seat. The capacity is three. That’s enough!