It's been a few days since our last Choose Your Eternity Poll (in which the overwhelming majority of voters opted for Hopped-Up Crown Victoria Hell), but the series returns today with a vengeance! We've been spending a lot of time in British Car Hell lately, but we mustn't forget England's perennial rival for the Hell Project Crown: Italy. And we're not talking Fiats or Lancias or even Bianchis this time around... nope, get ready to dive into the real inferno!

What kind of world is it where the asking price of a real Ferrari is lower than a lot of Fiero-based kit cars? Who would take the Fierarri over the real thing? That's why we couldn't quite believe our eyes when we saw this 1985 Ferrari Mondial Convertible (go here if the ad disappears) with an asking price of just 12 grand. Sure, the Mondial isn't quite as high-zoot as its more powerful siblings, but its owner can still hold his or her head high! This one looks pretty good, although it needs that TLC thing so many sellers mention. This statement might be of some interest to potential buyers: "engine was working fine up until a week ago when it just stopped." Yes, it just stopped- how big a problem could that be? Heck, maybe it's just a loose wire to the ignition system... or maybe the seller didn't have the time to type out "Engine was working fine up until a week ago when a terrible clatter arose from 'neath the hood, followed by a tremendous fireball engulfing the engine compartment, a hail of broken valves spraying out of the tailpipe, and the voice of Beelzebub on the radio, taunting me." No, it just stopped.

Ferraris are pretty cool, but an '85 Ferrari may be Too Much Eighties, if you know what I mean and I think you do- everyone will think you spent stolen S&L money on hair transplants when they see you driving it. But you want an exotic Italian machine, don't you? How about moving into the 21st century, by picking up this 2002 Maserati Coupe (go here if the ad disappears) for an amazing $20,000? The seller claimed that it "Must be sold by 12/21/07," but the ad is still up a week later, so we figure the car's still available... maybe way cheaper than $20K by now, too. Why so cheap? We won't beat around the bush here: this Maserati's hit something pretty hard and the body is a mess (and, most likely, other stuff is broken as well). But the 385-horse V8 and paddle-shifted automatic are still in good shape, so you could have some fun with this thing. How about grafting the front body panels from an Olds Achieva onto this baby? Or maybe even order up the correct Maserati parts- hey, how much could that cost?

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